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View Full Version : 218 - SPOTLIGHTED! (Pics inside)



OCK
02-02-2009, 03:22 AM
Level name: 218
Creator: OCK



It's been a long time coming but my third level is finally done. This level is the result of 80+ hours of hard work and a couple of very loooong creative blocks. Fortunately I have had large bursts of creative energy the past week that have allowed me to finish the project which I hope everyone will enjoy. After "The Legion" I knew I wanted to do something in the sci-fi genre and the MGS pack came at a perfect time. Without the paintinator and the materials/decorations from the MGS pack this level would not have been possible. As always I have provided pics and notes on every aspect of my level which I hope you will take the time to read through:

Pics:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3385/3245582649_66da70eb5c_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3364/3246410752_60b30409d0_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3126/3245583239_5694d94a83_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3446/3246411312_524326ab5d_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3353/3245583833_f3571f83f8_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3088/3245584125_b8ee42b98f_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3356/3246412094_4629bbbb5e_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3332/3245584703_67e82c08a8_m.jpg
http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3328/3246412650_ce2a2abbd7_m.jpg





Story/Theme:

The story here revolves around a character named 218 (you). Who is 218? Where is 218? All these questions are answered in the story and although I wish I could say more here it would really spoil a lot of the surprises. The main themes I wanted to explore were vengeance, solitude and memory. I also wanted to look at subjects that were important/of interest to me such as science and illusion. All of these are weaved into what is my deepest and most complex story yet. There is a lot of symbolism/metaphor in the objects I have created/ stickers I have used which I will leave up to the individual player to interpret. I even went so far as to integrate symbolism into the voices of the NPC's. I would kindly ask anyone wanting to discuss the story after playing the level to use spoiler tags so as to not spoil it for others :)

The numbers themselves are the most important numbers in my personal life which is the only reason I used them :)


Single Player Gameplay:


Once again I have intended this level for SINGLE PLAYER! In terms of gameplay I wanted to try my hand at some puzzles which I have not done in my previous levels. I think I have managed to create some truly original stuff and I am happy with the end result. I would say the level is a mix or action/puzzles with a touch of platforming. There is also vehicle-based gameplay in the latter part of the level. I have played a couple of levels that made use of an anti-grav vehicle but it was never controllable and it forced the player to hang on without letting go. I created something that is both controllable AND weaponized and I think it's pretty cool. A special thanks here to NinjaMicWZ who first discovered you can capture paintballs and who partly inspired some of the gameplay with his level Paintball 3000 A.D.

Lighting


I knew from the start that I wanted a strong emphasis on lighting and I wanted to use lighting in ways that have not been done before. Takelow was a major inspiration here. I think he is truly a "master of lighting" and his work really inspired me to push my use of this element to a whole new level. Everything from LED's to Fairy Lights to Spotlights to Searchlights to Candles is employed. I hope you enjoy some of the visual effects I was able to create with all this lighting.

Playtesting and Community Support


The following people either playtested the level at various points or encouraged/supported me throughout the creation process: Whaaaale, Takelow, NinjaMicWZ, Jaeyden, Hexagohn, Voltiare, Xx FAF Sniper xX. Thanks for everything guys, I appreciate it. I need to point out that I did not playtest the final 40% of the level with anyone else so there may be 1 0r 2 bugs. I personalluy playtested dozens of times so here should not be any major problems. I also want to thank DrunkMiffy who gave me the idea of using a slide to move checkpoints when I posted in the HELP section a long time ago. I used the idea and it worked perfectly :)



Feedback4Feedback

As of right now I am willing to accept 218 F4F's (no, I am not joking). I know there are some people who have yet to return feedback on my levels so here is your chance lol. For everyone else just let me know what level you want to me to leave feedback on after your comments, old or new, it doesn't matter to me. If you do NOT have a current level then that's fine too. I will comment on any future releases you put out there (which I would have done anyway for the most part). If you do not have a lot to say except "I enjoyed the level" or "This was not my cup of tea" then that is fine too. I will still check out your level and repay the courtesy.


I look forward to every one's thoughts and I hope you enjoy my creation. Once again this level is dedicated to my daughter :)

Voltiare
02-02-2009, 04:30 AM
No feedback necessary. Instead, come online so I can show you my puzzles already. I've been so looking forward to blowing your mind.

Anyway, the level is good, but it lacks player direction. You need to work on your camera zone skills. For example, the part where me and Trap had the most trouble...the garden scene. How were we supposed to know that we should jump down when the camera doesn't show that the player could? Another example would be the static camera zones that I have seen in your levels before. It just doesn't play right to me. I am driving or running and I have to run all the way to the edge of the screen before the screen follows me (and very jerky-like I might add) so I know where I am going. I would either make the zone smaller or increase the player follows slider.

Another issue is speech bubbles. This isn't new, but the ending was a wall of text lol. Simmer down now. 5 speech bubbles at a time. I know the story will demand some text, but there has got to be a way to trim some off.

Thirdly, is there anyway to make the vehicle you travel on cooler looking? It's just so basic. Oh and maybe you could put Trap's Alternating Switch to control the direction of the car. Grab once goes forward, grab again and it goes back. Trap rammed it into a wall and we had to start over. It would help out to make it idiot proof lol.

It may seem like I am hating this level, but I don't. I don't play your levels because they are flawless, I play them because I know it is going to be something that is totally unique. You use shapes that most never use (stars on the walls and such), colors people rarely use (Purple, blue, pink tie die craziness) and do things that people rarely do (Make a strange timing puzzle or have people shooting in a car upside down). You have a knack for story and artistic design, but I think if you should work on your sense of cameras, objects (like the vehicle), and condensing your story into fewer speech bubbles.

I still gave you 5 stars and hearted as I didn't want to ruin your chance to get on the highest rated. You deserve recognition as it is still a lot better than most levels.

Neverynnal
02-02-2009, 04:40 AM
I'm pretty pumped for this level OCK. Your material is top-notch stuff and as soon as I can commit some time to my PS3 I'll make sure to tackle this level and give you a nice review :) Screens look phenomenal by the way.

OCK
02-02-2009, 04:44 AM
Anyway, the level is good, but it lacks player direction. You need to work on your camera zone skills. For example, the part where me and Trap had the most trouble...the garden scene. How were we supposed to know that we should jump down when the camera doesn't show that the player could? Another example would be the static camera zones that I have seen in your levels before. It just doesn't play right to me. I am driving or running and I have to run all the way to the edge of the screen before the screen follows me (and very jerky-like I might add) so I know where I am going. I would either make the zone smaller or increase the player follows slider.


OK, I will work on the cam zones and apologize that they caused frustration.


the garden scene. How were we supposed to know that we should jump down when the camera doesn't show that the player could?

You are NOT supposed to jump down lol. A glowing orb comes down from the heavens and the player dies, respawning then in the "Hall of Light" below. It is timed to come down right after the player finishes reading the speech bubbles but maybe I will speed it up.


Another issue is speech bubbles. This isn't new, but the ending was a wall of text lol. Simmer down now. 5 speech bubbles at a time. I know the story will demand some text, but there has got to be a way to trim some off.

Honestly man, this is who I am. I like to tell a tale and there was so much more I could have wrote but I knew I already had a lot. I understand not everyone appreciate a good story but at least I am true to myself. Maybe for my next level I will have no speech bubbles...


Thirdly, is there anyway to make the vehicle you travel on cooler looking? It's just so basic. Oh and maybe you could put Trap's Alternating Switch to control the direction of the car. Grab once goes forward, grab again and it goes back. Trap rammed it into a wall and we had to start over. It would help out to make it idiot proof lol.

The room in the vehicle is limited but I will check out how the switch works. Regarding the decoration on the vehicle, on one hand I wanted to keep it basic and keep the players eye focused on all the lighting vs staring at the car. On the other hand I suppose I could do a bit more with it lol. When you say Trap rammed into a wall and had to restart do you mean restart the level? I added that speech bubble directing the player "to kill themselves" if they get stuck. That way they can respawn a new vehicle and continue on their way. There is absolutely no need to restart the level, that is why I made a spawnable vehicle and added the speech bubble.


It may seem like I am hating this level, but I don't. I don't play your levels because they are flawless, I play them because I know it is going to be something that is totally unique. You use shapes that most never use (stars on the walls and such), colors people rarely use (Purple, blue, pink tie die craziness) and do things that people rarely do (Make a strange timing puzzle or have people shooting in a car upside down). You have a knack for story and artistic design, but I think if you should work on your sense of cameras, objects (like the vehicle), and condensing your story into fewer speech bubbles.



Well thanks for all this. Regarding a level being flawless, no level is. I just do what I do and hope people enjoy and appreciate it. I think I have a very distinct style and I guess not everyone is a big fan. No matter how much heart and soul I put into a level I know there will be those tha don't like it but what cna I do about that?


I still gave you 5 stars and hearted as I didn't want to ruin your chance to get on the highest rated. You deserve recognition as it is still a lot better than most levels.

Thanks but I hope you gave it 5 stars and a heart because you felt like the level genuinely deserved it lol.



I'm pretty pumped for this level OCK. Your material is top-notch stuff and as soon as I can commit some time to my PS3 I'll make sure to tackle this level and give you a nice review Screens look phenomenal by the way.


Thanks man, I look forward to your thoughts :)

CCubbage
02-02-2009, 04:46 AM
WHY do you have to do this to me???? I was tired, about to go to bed... now I need to play this level..... but Ok, here we go! ;)

Trap_T
02-02-2009, 04:49 AM
Trap rammed it into a wall and we had to start over. It would help out to make it idiot proof lol.

LOL _tear.

So ya, I played with Voltiare, and the level was nice, but after reading 50+ speech bubbles and the random light flickering and super bright white zones.. my eyes (and my back strangely) started to hurt.

Direction also, half the time I wasn't sure what to do or where to go... the part where you're in the box-vehicle shooting at the button that makes the semi-circle shoot out the blue light thing... we did it twice (my fault :D). The first time we shot at the button for a good 2-3 minutes and nothing seemed to be happening.. that's when I ran the vehicle into the wall ( :kz: ) and we had to restart. The second time Voltiare was hitting the button and it opened.. but I wasn't really paying attention so I wasn't sure what happened.

Then the garden area thing with the plants of life. I'm not sure if it was supposed to happen but the car fell apart.. all the wheels and the gun thing at the front.. so after trying to jump onto the plants we got stuck infront of the vehicle and were just jumping around till we some-how figured out to jump down.

All in all, it was nice. Just work on your spastic lighting :p and maybe add some more directional signs.

EDIT


You are NOT supposed to jump down lol. A glowing orb comes down from the heavens and the player dies, respawning then in the "Hall of Light" below. It is timed to come down right after the player finishes reading the speech bubbles but maybe I will speed it up.


That orb was supposed to kill us? It kinda just fell and was bouncing off to the side.. lol.



When you say Trap rammed into a wall and had to restart do you mean restart the level?

we just suicide'd and got into another vehicle.

NinjaMicWZ
02-02-2009, 04:54 AM
I'm taking my time with this review, but oddly enough, I want to rebut the camera angle issue. Early on in my creations I really strove for the cinematic allusion that a great camera angle can give, and I more-or-less failed with it to where I mostly work only with the most advantageous camera angle rather than the most cinematic or dramatic. I think you have a balance of both and your long, and drastically skewed camera angles (ex: the bridge battle), and the transition (ex: from the first drone, to the elevator) are very clean and add so much to what is typically a brief experience. I think that was something that helped Legion feel so epic and grand in it's confines, and is even more-so present here.

I could see the camera follow really screwing up for a multiplayer run through... I had to log off and quit when 4 people joined and they burned through all our lives in like 5 seconds. I didn't kick them because I wanted them to keep playing. So really, you could think about sacrificing effect for appeal to a wider spectrum of players (the gang), or opt for the more appreciative solo player and have a smaller reception because of it.

I'll be back with more soon.

EDIT: The 2nd checkpoint at the bridge has forced me to restart twice. It respawns me directly into a missle from the 3rd wall's fire everytime. If you die there, you die for good.

3rd restart... I can't finish this yet.

OCK
02-02-2009, 05:00 AM
WHY do you have to do this to me???? I was tired, about to go to bed... now I need to play this level..... but Ok, here we go!

lol, sorry :)



Direction also, half the time I wasn't sure what to do or where to go...

You know it's funny but when I added direction to my boss battle in the Legion some people said it was unnecessary. This level already has a ton of speech so in certain areas where (to me) it is obvious what the player should do I did not want to add even more speech bubbles. Having said all that based on the initial feedback perhaps I will hold the players hand a bit more.


Then the garden area thing with the plants of life. I'm not sure if it was supposed to happen but the car fell apart.. all the wheels and the gun thing at the front.. so after trying to jump onto the plants we got stuck infront of the vehicle and were just jumping around till we some-how figured out to jump down.

Certain parts of the vehicle are supposed to dissolve (wheel support, cannon etc) but the main structure remains. What amazes me is that you you were actually able to get out of the vehicle lol. I designed a grid that does not allow the player to exit so please let me know how you did it. I think I will make the speech here all cutscene so the player cannot move. When the orb comes down it triggers emmiters with poison gas in the vehicle that kill the player but if you manageg to exit then naturally you would not have been killed lol. I will do some tweaking here.


but after reading 50+ speech bubbles and the random light flickering and super bright white zones.. my eyes (and my back strangely) started to hurt.

Sorry for this but the lighting is intentional. I guess those that are a bit sensitive to it might not enjoy it too much lol.

Thanks for checking out the level.

Voltiare
02-02-2009, 05:05 AM
OK, I will work on the cam zones and apologize that they caused frustration.

You are NOT supposed to jump down lol. A glowing orb comes down from the heavens and the player dies, respawning then in the "Hall of Light" below. It is timed to come down right after the player finishes reading the speech bubbles but maybe I will speed it up.Oh. Well, that didn't happen. We managed to survive and escape the car. We then were like "What now?". Since the camera is pointed up, we tried climbing the plants lol. Then I just jumped down and fell down to heaven.

This was the biggest flaw in the whole level. If we really just got unlucky (I'll play it again and make sure), then it goes way up and you can almost forget about the camera zone problems. Just try to use less static cams I think.



Honestly man, this is who I am. I like to tell a tale and there was so much more I could have wrote but I knew I already had a lot. I understand not everyone appreciate a good story but at least I am true to myself. Maybe for my next level I will have no speech bubbles...Aw, don't get like that. You know I love you lol. I know it is hard to do with LBP since you can't create any cutscene or whatever to tell the story without words so if you love creating a story and you need a lot of speech bubbles to do it, then do it. It didn't stop me from finishing it, it was just a minor suggestion.


The room in the vehicle is limited but I will check out how the switch works. Regarding the decoration on the vehicle, on one hand I wanted to keep it basic and keep the players eye focused on all the lighting vs staring at the car. On the other hand I suppose I could do a bit more with it lol. When you say Trap rammed into a wall and had to restart do you mean restart the level? I added that speech bubble directing the player "to kill themselves" if they get stuck. That way they can respawn a new vehicle and continue on their way. There is absolutely no need to restart the level, that is why I made a spawnable vehicle and added the speech bubble.The switch is actually off screen so room won't be an issue.

I would do a bit more. It should look awesome for how much that guy hyped it up lol. My philosophy is that you can't have too much awesome.

Trap ran it into the wall blocking our way, and we couldn't shoot what we needed to shoot anymore so we killed ourselves and went back to the start. I was like "Nice one". With the alternating switch, you grab the button and it goes forward. If you go forward to much, you can grab again to go backwards. If you need to go forward again, grab it again.


Well thanks for all this. Regarding a level being flawless, no level is. I just do what I do and hope people enjoy and appreciate it. I think I have a very distinct style and I guess not everyone is a big fan. No matter how much heart and soul I put into a level I know there will be those tha don't like it but what cna I do about that?True that.


Thanks but I hope you gave it 5 stars and a heart because you felt like the level genuinely deserved it lol.On the run I had where we didn't die and we had to jump down, I would have given it 4 stars because we had no idea that we were supposed to die lol. It was a potential game stopper and it should be fixed. Make it impossible for the player to not die.


Direction also, half the time I wasn't sure what to do or where to go... the part where you're in the box-vehicle shooting at the button that makes the semi-circle shoot out the blue light thing... we did it twice (my fault :D). The first time we shot at the button for a good 2-3 minutes and nothing seemed to be happening.. that's when I ran the vehicle into the wall ( :kz: ) and we had to restart. The second time Voltiare was hitting the button and it opened.. but I wasn't really paying attention so I wasn't sure what happened.I think this was actually your fault and not OCK. You were firing at the button so fast that you probably activated the emitter before the emitted object could hit the key so that it would dissappear and the emitter would do another one. When I shot it, I did controlled bursts that only activated the emitter once.

Trap_T
02-02-2009, 05:16 AM
What amazes me is that you you were actually able to get out of the vehicle lol. I designed a grid that does not allow the player to exit so please let me know how you did it.

Well, originally I escaped by jumping onto the leaves of the plants, and I'm not sure if Voltiare escaped the same way, but after a bit the door in the back was opening and closing.

On a side note the orb that was supposed to kill us didn't even land on the vehicle, it landed off to the left inside the wall.


I think this was actually your fault and not OCK. You were firing at the button so fast that you probably activated the emitter before the emitted object could hit the key so that it would dissappear and the emitter would do another one. When I shot it, I did controlled bursts that only activated the emitter once.

Ya, maybe.. but even with me just holding on firing at the button continuously, the blue light ball made it past the blue part of the wall, which I though was what we had to hit. But I could see it being my fault.. I'm a failure! :(

Yarbone
02-02-2009, 05:20 AM
Hey you finally managed to complete it! coool!
I'm gonna play it right away!!!!

Voltiare
02-02-2009, 05:21 AM
Well, originally I escaped by jumping onto the leaves of the plants, and I'm not sure if Voltiare escaped the same way, but after a bit the door in the back was opening and closing.

On a side note the orb that was supposed to kill us didn't even land on the vehicle, it landed off to the left inside the wall.

Ya, maybe.. but even with me just holding on firing at the button continuously, the blue light ball made it past the blue part of the wall, which I though was what we had to hit. But I could see it being my fault.. I'm a failure! :(I think we were able to rock the car around with our weight. Maybe that was part of it. And I guess whatever switch controlled the motor of the door broke off so it was opening and closing.

And yes, you are.

Ozwald_the_cat
02-02-2009, 05:27 AM
Hey OCK,

I guess I'll have to write a review in pieces, I tried your level but got stuck. I was at the Destiny with the rotating moon/arch, first time I drove it into the wall and could not go back or aim at anything productive so I retriedand drove all the way back up there. Second time I shot the cover off the button and kept shooting the button...stuff would fly out of the spinning arch and once and a while go near the moon but not do any thing. I changed my position/angle a couple times and nothing seemed to happen after minuted of firing at the button then I heard the sound of an object breaking and the arch would no longer fire.

I'll try the level again tomorrow and see if I get farther.

Trap_T
02-02-2009, 05:34 AM
I drove it into the wall

HA.

I feel better now.

Thee-Flash
02-02-2009, 05:35 AM
If you made it then it's great haha, cool man i'd love to give this a good play mate,


80 hours + then i have no doubts this will be short of amazing

CCubbage
02-02-2009, 05:41 AM
Okay, just finished.....




Wow.




Gotta say, I personally think this is a masterpiece. Personally, I went through the entire game without a hitch, so I can't really give bug feedback.

PROS:

I pretty much liked everything I saw. The subject of a lot of text boxes is subjective. I KNOW some people are going to say "do I REALLY need to click through all this text??" But I'm a reader and I like a good story. I loved the text... I can understand why some wouldn't, and I REALLY wish LBP could just have a single scrolling text box with a WHOLE BUNCH of text in it, but for now this is really the only way to have a detailed story.... one little bubble at a time. I wouldn't want to see it go away.

I thought the vehicle design was phenominal. The way it could turn to a complete different angle, but I could still controll all 3 operations was VERY cool.

The lighting was excellent. I think I had to squint a few times because it felt like the sun was shining in my eyes, which is very cool.

CONS:

I'm actually somewhere between a few of the other reviewers here. I love the camera angels, but think they could use some tiny tweaks. For instance, whenever you are running with a single player and you move completely out of the scene (so that the counter starts counting down) is a little odd. On these places just a tiny tiny tweak to the player tracking could make the camera angels absolutely perfect.




Hey OCK,

I guess I'll have to write a review in pieces, I tried your level but got stuck. I was at the Destiny with the rotating moon/arch, first time I drove it into the wall and could not go back or aim at anything productive so I retriedand drove all the way back up there. Second time I shot the cover off the button and kept shooting the button...stuff would fly out of the spinning arch and once and a while go near the moon but not do any thing. I changed my position/angle a couple times and nothing seemed to happen after minuted of firing at the button then I heard the sound of an object breaking and the arch would no longer fire.

I'll try the level again tomorrow and see if I get farther.

Oh come on, eh! What's this all aboot? Can't aim a little cannon? I would think you were all practiced up from hunting moose! Maybe your toque was on too tight. Have another beer, hoser!

Inter-thread reference. Beauty, eh?

Voltiare
02-02-2009, 05:57 AM
Just played it again and it flows better in single-player lol. It also didn't hurt that I already knew how to do everything. But the player is still able to get out of the cart. Just jump off the back of it onto the leaves.

I felt I was being kind've unfair because I didn't actually say anything specific that I liked lol. Harsh, eh?

Things I liked:

- The 1st room of training. The turrent is challenging and the use of cover from above is never done.
- The second room of training. Timing puzzles are fun. I would probably switch around the switches as they are in sequential order. Might make it more fun.
- The little touches like the emitter that says "Do you not see?" or the simulated sunlight.
- The "transporter" effect.
- The light shows. Especially the sun. BTW, Trap managed to shoot and break it. I tried and failed.
- The story. It's actually really good although I kind've guessed the ending beforehand. There is always a twist.

Jaeyden
02-02-2009, 06:25 AM
Wow! OCK. I'm blown away. That was well worth the wait. Congratulations on that baby. You should be proud of it.

Pros: OCK is a storyteller. Hook, line and sinker. I can't wait to know what happens next. I was very sad when the level ended. That rarely happens to me.

This level is big! It feels big. How many different distinct areas do you visit? Like 7 or 8? It definitely captures a feeling of being transported to and journeying through wildly different places. As a creator I felt like he had to have used the entire level space.

Polished to the hilt. I can tell how much time and effort went into this just by the look of the entire thing. All your colors, lights, stickers and materials were carefully selected and meticulously placed.

Cons: I was a bit stumped by the switch and the vehicle part but I did figured it out. It's nothing that a little tweaking won't fix.

One camera angle, I believe at the beginning of garden, when scene dissolves..top right corner you can see the last area. Just a small adjustment of the camera should fix er.

This is a level that I hope everyone here will play. You just have to see it. It's inspiring and as a creator that's ultimately what I look for in levels. Bravo OCK! More to come on my next play through.

OCK
02-02-2009, 07:49 AM
I'm taking my time with this review, but oddly enough, I want to rebut the camera angle issue. Early on in my creations I really strove for the cinematic allusion that a great camera angle can give, and I more-or-less failed with it to where I mostly work only with the most advantageous camera angle rather than the most cinematic or dramatic. I think you have a balance of both and your long, and drastically skewed camera angles (ex: the bridge battle), and the transition (ex: from the first drone, to the elevator) are very clean and add so much to what is typically a brief experience. I think that was something that helped Legion feel so epic and grand in it's confines, and is even more-so present here.

Thanks man. I personally think dynamic camera zones really add some flavour so I am happy you feel the same way.


The 2nd checkpoint at the bridge has forced me to restart twice. It respawns me directly into a missle from the 3rd wall's fire everytime. If you die there, you die for good.


Moved the checkpoint :)



Second time I shot the cover off the button and kept shooting the button...stuff would fly out of the spinning arch and once and a while go near the moon but not do any thing. I changed my position/angle a couple times and nothing seemed to happen after minuted of firing at the button then I heard the sound of an object breaking and the arch would no longer fire.

You have to time your shot so that the ball of light flies right into the moon, thus dissolving the wall. Hopefully you will be able to get past it now.



If you made it then it's great haha, cool man i'd love to give this a good play mate,


80 hours + then i have no doubts this will be short of amazing


Thanks. Let me know what you think.



Gotta say, I personally think this is a masterpiece. Personally, I went through the entire game without a hitch, so I can't really give bug feedback.

Thanks for this man. I have labelled a few levels masterpieces so it's nice that someone thought the same of my level lol.

PROS:


I pretty much liked everything I saw. The subject of a lot of text boxes is subjective. I KNOW some people are going to say "do I REALLY need to click through all this text??" But I'm a reader and I like a good story. I loved the text... I can understand why some wouldn't, and I REALLY wish LBP could just have a single scrolling text box with a WHOLE BUNCH of text in it, but for now this is really the only way to have a detailed story.... one little bubble at a time. I wouldn't want to see it go away.


Thanks a lot for this. You are the same type of gamer as I am which is to say you really like a great story and it's good to know that all the hard work put into the writing is appreciated by some.




I thought the vehicle design was phenominal. The way it could turn to a complete different angle, but I could still controll all 3 operations was VERY cool.

This was the source of the most bugs and headaches so I am glad the final product paid off lol.


The lighting was excellent. I think I had to squint a few times because it felt like the sun was shining in my eyes, which is very cool.

Thanks, I hope I didn't blind you lol.

CONS:


I'm actually somewhere between a few of the other reviewers here. I love the camera angels, but think they could use some tiny tweaks. For instance, whenever you are running with a single player and you move completely out of the scene (so that the counter starts counting down) is a little odd. On these places just a tiny tiny tweak to the player tracking could make the camera angels absolutely perfect.


I will definitely be doing some minor tweaks with the cam zones seeing as how it is a reoccuring issue.

Thanks for all the feedback man. I am glad you enoyed it.



I felt I was being kind've unfair because I didn't actually say anything specific that I liked lol. Harsh, eh?

Things I liked:


- The 1st room of training. The turrent is challenging and the use of cover from above is never done.
- The second room of training. Timing puzzles are fun. I would probably switch around the switches as they are in sequential order. Might make it more fun.
- The little touches like the emitter that says "Do you not see?" or the simulated sunlight.
- The "transporter" effect.
- The light shows. Especially the sun. BTW, Trap managed to shoot and break it. I tried and failed.
- The story. It's actually really good although I kind've guessed the ending beforehand. There is always a twist.


Thanks for taking the time to come back and point out what you liked. I always let creators know the parts I enjoyed most and aknowledge all the small details they put into a level.




Wow! OCK. I'm blown away. That was well worth the wait. Congratulations on that baby. You should be proud of it.

Pros: OCK is a storyteller. Hook, line and sinker. I can't wait to know what happens next. I was very sad when the level ended. That rarely happens to me.

This level is big! It feels big. How many different distinct areas do you visit? Like 7 or 8? It definitely captures a feeling of being transported to and journeying through wildly different places. As a creator I felt like he had to have used the entire level space.

Polished to the hilt. I can tell how much time and effort went into this just by the look of the entire thing. All your colors, lights, stickers and materials were carefully selected and meticulously placed.


Wow man, coming from you that means a lot. As far as I am concerned The Abyss is still the best level out there so your praise is especially siginificant for me.

I did want to create a few "looks" for the level while still keeping it cohesive and within the context of the story so I am happy you enjoyed all the different set-pieces.

Cons: I was a bit stumped by the switch and the vehicle part but I did figured it out. It's nothing that a little tweaking won't fix.


One camera angle, I believe at the beginning of garden, when scene dissolves..top right corner you can see the last area. Just a small adjustment of the camera should fix er.

Thanks for this. I think I might add a speech bubble and I will look into that camera zone.

Thanks again for your comments, I really do appreciate it :)

Takelow
02-02-2009, 01:09 PM
Ok, i just finished this one OCK, and i must say 218 is AWESOME!
I don't have the time right now to expose my full comments, but i will be back very soon...
Keep the GREAT work man!

OCK
02-02-2009, 02:10 PM
Ok, i just finished this one OCK, and i must say 218 is AWESOME!
I don't have the time right now to expose my full comments, but i will be back very soon...
Keep the GREAT work man!

I look forward to your thoughts. Your opinion is of great importance to me.


UPDATE

- Changed the order of the swicthes in the second training room (thanks Voltiare)

- Fixed a bug that allowed the player to access restricted part of level. A big thanks to Takelow who sent me a PSN msg telling me about the bug.

- Moved checkpoint near bridge (thanks Nina)

- Added some decoration at the battle with the snake.

- Changed the material on the main body of my anti-grav cart. Added a background piece to it as well. It is now impossible to rock it back and forth during the Garden segment and it is no longer possible to exit the vehicle so the scene now plays out the way it was meant to (Thanks Trap T and Voltiare).

- Fixed another bug that Takelow found right where you get the vehicle that made it possible to jump into the foreground and thus back down to an earlier part of the level. Add posion gas to kill the player if they attempt this.

- Added a speech bubble to the moon and orb section as well as slowed down the rotation of the half-circle. It is much easier to time the shot and the player now knows what to do (Thanks Trap T and Jaeyden).


That's it for now. I fixed the major problems and do not expect anymore. Thanks again to all who have played/commented/hearted thus far, I appreciate it. My level was 5 stars for about an hour then some clown came along and I guess gave it a 1 star rating so down to 4 stars now (also got a repetitive tag, made me chuckle). I look forward to more peoples's thoughts in the coming days :)

GruntosUK
02-02-2009, 03:17 PM
Playing your level Ock, here are my thoughts as they come to me.

+ Like all the custom pictures as posters
+ The logic puzzle is very good. It took me a couple of attempts to work out the swtiches, but very well put together.
+ Good use of lighting.
+ Dialogue is well written. The story is good
+ Teleporter is designed well.
+ I had a problem with the look of the planet (below), not so in the temple (??) after the chasm, it looks very good.
+ Liked the snake enemy and the venom it spat, a good used of the MGS projectile (plasma ball??)
+ Puzzles are wel done and fit te story nicely
+ The Do You Not See Writing looked nice.
+ You have a good look to this level, the lighting and shining enviroment all coloured looks very very good. Makes it look alien in appearance, which I suppose is your goal ;)
+ I've never thought about emitting paintballs in that way, it has given me a load of ideas for my next level though (if you don't mind of course)!!!!
+ Excellent lighting again.
+ AMAZING STORY AND WRITING

- The space station you were on looked great, the planet does'nt look as good. The rock you walk on looks a little bland and theres no background
- Add a few sound effects to the puzzles to make players aware they have succeeded.
- The camera angles on the destiny machine are sometimes a little off, and make it hard to see in front of you

The faults I found were very minor, there were no glitches are game breaking events.

I loved the level, the look was excellent. The writing was very very well done and it lots of different elements to keep you intrested. Hurry up and continue the story

***** and "beautiful" tag left, hearted also

bindibaji
02-02-2009, 04:46 PM
Hello just played your level. Here some notes I jotted down whilst playing.
The car and stair case could have a little longer on item life. Maybe me being rubbish.
Orb puzzle is cool could have a whole level based on that :)
Boss is nice, maybe some thing to make you move from behind the cover.
Your stairs are really nice often stairs in levels are annoying.
Teleporter is cool I want to see sackboy and a fly go into it a see what comes out.
After going up the stairs after defeating the snake. You go behind a wall with a small slit in it that you can see sackboy through. I got Electricuted for no obvious reason near the begining of this. This is before the crying eyes.
The step up to your moving fortress.Could you make it a slope as when I restarted at that check point I couldn't get that the jump straight away as it's all black.

Overall the level is wicked. Mostly down to the unique puzzles (Moon mini game has a good feeling when you complete it) and game play and a nice vibrant use of lighting.

Wicked 4*

If you have time check out Evil Bear + of my levels.

Ineedhelp9
02-02-2009, 05:50 PM
I'm reading this at school but I'll try the level when I get home

Yarbone
02-02-2009, 06:13 PM
OOOOk here's my feedback for youuuuu :D

Love the room where you begin...

Then.. to get in the elavator... I thought it might have been easier if you made the elavator start somewhat higher so you can easily jump in, i think. I didn't immediately realize that you had to grab it in order to enter it.

The part where you have to drag the car to the other end is pretty cool. But i think the car looks, like... not really cool, if you what i mean :/ And i constantly got the message that i had to drag the car to the other end when i spawned a new car.

Then the orb puzzle! Super amazing stuff man! It's ingenious :D
I didn't really see where the orb had to end, though... maybe put a light or something as an indication where you have to put the orb. Other than that... AMAZING!

After that, i think, the boss came. I don't know if i did what i was supposed to do there, but i just sprinted towards the boss. After i was near the boss, he stopped shooting, and if i was close enough he just wouldn't should. I just beat him by standing near him, while he was doing nothing. Sooooo i think this is a bug... don't know for sure.

After that, i believe, I had to grab a key... It was black so i couldn't easily find it. Don't get me wrong but i thought it was just a peace of rubble that came from the boss.

Ok so as you may have noticed... I can't remember anything in the right order xD

Anyway let's continue

I came at the point where you had to shoot the fish things. (don't exactly know what they are xD)
Pretty good stuff here... Really well balanced.
The first time i played it i died here because i constantly kept dying because i respawned while a bomb was being shot at me, but you already fixed that when i played it the 2nd time- thanks to nina :). (first time i had to stop because i died and i was tired xD)
I liked this part :D

Ok after that super cool white power source thing... Looks really good :)

Then i came at the teleporting pod. You did this really nice, I only missed some super cool teleporting sound just at the moment of teleporting. Might want to ad a sound here ;)

Now... a while after that i believe there was this crying wall or something.... Really cool puzzle. Especially, because the "eyes" where electrified so you had to shoot them. Love it!
But maybe a minor change here though... You can hear the tear dropping, and i think it was a wooden tear wich made kinda odd sound when falling on the floor. Maybe it's a good idea to change the life spawn of the tears so they dissappear just before they hit the ground.

Now i'm at the awesome vehicle ride.. I liked it! Nice design...
when i came at the enemy i couldn't shoot anymore because i was already to close to him... unfortunately there was no reverse gear xD I had to commit suicide O.O and spawn another vehicle.

Ok i didn't see any problems from here on...

I have to say that, the sun you made there was pretty neat. Nice effects :D

That's it.... 5 stars and not yet hearted, i think, Just as i did with the legion xD
But i already hearted "The Legion" :D

Wow this is probably my longest post ever >__>

Entity
02-02-2009, 11:27 PM
Great level, man! This just screams hours of hard work. I love the unique storytelling style in your levels. :)

I did notice a small spelling mistake at the boss at the 3rd section, though, you used 'barries' instead of 'barriers'

I also noticed a hole, just after the 'do you not see' part, which, if you fall into, will take you to an earlier part of the level. If you move to the right at the part with the lights, just after the various voices saying 'earth', you can fall back to the part with the two checkpoints.

Also, about the part with the 2 checkpoints, I found that part pretty easy (I could kill the enemies from a distance) so 2 checkpoints are unneccesarry. maybe a double-life checkpoint should be placed there instead.

NinjaMicWZ
02-03-2009, 12:32 AM
Alright, I finished it. I think your stories are limited by the scope of this game, OCK... and I don't think a single level, or even multiple levels, has enough opportunity for juncture points and proper room for pacing to live up to your lofty concepts. I'm always impressed that you can manage this in any form though. Just know that by the time I met my finale (who looked awesome, btw) I was very intrigued and captivated by the unfolding tale.

My favorite parts of this level are in the station... the room, and the very half-Kubrik/half Flash Gordon sci fi feel. I was going to suggest that you changed the order of switches on the egg machine, so I'm glad you did. I like the camera work on the agility training and when I got to swingin' on the ceiling I was into it, alot - that was very future-commando.

I love what you did with your eyetoy scans, to give it this feeling of faint memories in traces of psyche, and modern art all at the same time. I also love the spotlight section, and of course the end. I love the abundance of dialogue there... honestly, I don't think it's going to do anything for most players or help you out ratings-wise, but know that I like it and would enjoy a story like this in a much broader scope. My other favorite bit was the snake Yorva who drops the eye - something about that section, the color, and the enemy just hits my 8 and 16-bit RPG buttons.

I kind of liked what you did with the "shock" moment better than the tears now... but it is more fitting conceptually. That was a very Treasure-looking design.

I really like the vehicle's control scheme and what you do with it, I have since you first showed it to me... I just don't like that it's a basic black square with decorations. I also think you should keep the music going right there, because the pace really slows to a crawl at that point and the lull of sound doesn't fit to me. I like the bit with the moon, but I'm not sure why it's set to activate only every other turn after hitting the button.

After finishing, I can see how theme changes from space to space in accord with the exploration of the psyche, and that is very cool. I think you put the most time into the station - where it benefits from a texture set that is always more detailed (the MG metal) and the various eyetoy scans, down to the blinking lights on the robots. Is the apple supposed to symbolize the forbidden fruit of knowledge and a foreshadowing of things to come? lol, if so you're a conceptual genius.

When the bridge fell, I had a little trouble getting on top of it... see if you can slant down, or round off the back of his head to make sure players can do it with a single, regular jump from any spot on the beak.

I wish the sequel was already available.

aer0blue
02-03-2009, 12:56 AM
OCK, glad to see you published this! Finally. d:

I'll give it a shot during the week when I can! Got so much stuff to do. >_<;

Mrgenji
02-03-2009, 01:13 AM
pretty pictures are always a nice way to get me to look at a level - i'll be sure to give this a shot in the morning!

OCK
02-03-2009, 01:39 AM
GrantosUK - Thanks for all the feedback. Allow me to address a couple of points in particular.


+ I've never thought about emitting paintballs in that way, it has given me a load of ideas for my next level though (if you don't mind of course)!!!!

Once again credit here goes to NinjaMicWZ. He was the first to implement paintaball capture into a vehicle/object and that partly inspired my vehicle segment.



- The space station you were on looked great, the planet does'nt look as good. The rock you walk on looks a little bland and theres no background

The background is black throughout this whole planet for a reason, both as symbolism and for aesthetic reasons. As for the rock I don't know what to say, I personally like it lol.


- Add a few sound effects to the puzzles to make players aware they have succeeded.

lol, sorry but your TV must have been on mute because I have sound effects on EVERY puzzle to indicate the player has passed it. I use a VR sf from he MGS pack. How did you not hear this?


The camera angles on the destiny machine are sometimes a little off, and make it hard to see in front of you

Once again the whole vehicle segment was a source of many bugs and headaches and more then once I almost gave up lol. There is still some tweaking to be done here so I will do what I can.


Hurry up and continue the story

***** and "beautiful" tag left, hearted also

You may have to wait awhile on the sequel, this level really drained me lol.

Thanks for the heart and rating, I appreciate it. I will be checking out your new lvl in the next couple of days so expect some feedback soon.

__________________________________________________ _

bindibaji - Thanks for the feedback.


The car and stair case could have a little longer on item life. Maybe me being rubbish.

If the item life was longer then the challenge would be zero lol.


I got Electricuted for no obvious reason near the begining of this. This is before the crying eyes.

You got electrified for a very good reason. Chances are you still had the paintinator. By killing the player they are forced to get by the tears in order to grab the other paintinator on the other side. Just a bit more of a challenge.


The step up to your moving fortress.Could you make it a slope as when I restarted at that check point I couldn't get that the jump straight away as it's all black.

Not sure what you are talking about here. Could you please clarify?


Wicked 4*

Thanks although I have to ask, if this is not a 5 star level then what is? Still, I appreciate your honesty. I will check out your level soon, thanks again for the feedback.

__________________________________________________ _______________________


Yarbone - Thanks for all the feedback, I appreciate it.


Then.. to get in the elavator... I thought it might have been easier if you made the elavator start somewhat higher so you can easily jump in, i think. I didn't immediately realize that you had to grab it in order to enter it.

You do NOT have to grab to enter it. You simply need to press UP to jump into the background :)



But i think the car looks, like... not really cool, if you what i mean :/ And i constantly got the message that i had to drag the car to the other end when i spawned a new car.

lol, decorating this vehicle really wasn't a priority with all the other stuff I had to focus on but I think I will go back and spice it up a bit. The speech bubble is on the vehicle so you will get it each time you spawn a new car. There was no other way to implement this speech bubble that would have made sense.



Then the orb puzzle! Super amazing stuff man! It's ingenious

Thanks man. This really is one of the things I am most proud of in the level. Originally I was going to have something completely different here. Then I thought about doing some sort of orb puzzle and the rest is history :)


After that, i think, the boss came. I don't know if i did what i was supposed to do there, but i just sprinted towards the boss. After i was near the boss, he stopped shooting, and if i was close enough he just wouldn't should. I just beat him by standing near him, while he was doing nothing. Sooooo i think this is a bug... don't know for sure.

lol, you sprinted towards a boss that was firing a million plasma balls and missiles at you? You truly are a brave gamer. I thought I put in enough hazards to prevent the player from getting too close but it looks like I was wrong. I will try to do some tweaking today, thanks.


After that, i believe, I had to grab a key... It was black so i couldn't easily find it. Don't get me wrong but i thought it was just a peace of rubble that came from the boss.


I will change the color of the key :)


Then i came at the teleporting pod. You did this really nice, I only missed some super cool teleporting sound just at the moment of teleporting. Might want to ad a sound here

Great idea, I will fiddle around with it and see what I can come up with :)


You can hear the tear dropping, and i think it was a wooden tear wich made kinda odd sound when falling on the floor. Maybe it's a good idea to change the life spawn of the tears so they dissappear just before they hit the ground.

Good point, I will do some tweaking.


That's it.... 5 stars and not yet hearted, i think, Just as i did with the legion xD


Thanks a lot, I appreciate it.


Wow this is probably my longest post ever >__>

lol. If I have achieved nothing else with this level then at least I have prompted you to write your longest post yet! Thanks again for all the feedback. Please create a new level so I can repay the courtesy :)

__________________________________________________ _____________________


Entity - Thanks for the feedback.


I love the unique storytelling style in your levels.

It's good to see that the majority of the people who have commented are really liking the story. I put a lot of work into it so it makes me feel like it was worth it.


I did notice a small spelling mistake at the boss at the 3rd section, though, you used 'barries' instead of 'barriers'

Thanks for this, I will change it up.


I also noticed a hole, just after the 'do you not see' part, which, if you fall into, will take you to an earlier part of the level. If you move to the right at the part with the lights, just after the various voices saying 'earth', you can fall back to the part with the two checkpoints.

Strange, I tested that section. Come to think of it I made some chnages to the slide which may have opened a hole. Thanks for letting me know.


Also, about the part with the 2 checkpoints, I found that part pretty easy (I could kill the enemies from a distance) so 2 checkpoints are unneccesarry. maybe a double-life checkpoint should be placed there instead.

It's in there for those who don't find it so easy lol. I don't think it is too difficult myself but I don't want to frustrate anybody.

Thanks for the feedback. I will repay he courtesy once your current project is complete.


__________________________________________________ ____________________

NinjaMicWZ - I have eagerly awaited your thoughts and you have not disappointed lol. You are one of my favorite creators so I really do appreciate all this feedback.


I think your stories are limited by the scope of this game, OCK... and I don't think a single level, or even multiple levels, has enough opportunity for juncture points and proper room for pacing to live up to your lofty concepts. I'm always impressed that you can manage this in any form though. Just know that by the time I met my finale (who looked awesome, btw) I was very intrigued and captivated by the unfolding tale.

Thanks a lot for this man. I wish I could have fleshed out the story even more but I knew that I already had a ton of speech and it would have been overkill lol.


I like the camera work on the agility training and when I got to swingin' on the ceiling I was into it, alot - that was very future-commando.


Thanks man. I am still trying to decide whether I like this room better or the orb room lol. But yeah, destroying the turrent should really make the player feel ultra powerful.



I also love the spotlight section, and of course the end. I love the abundance of dialogue there... honestly, I don't think it's going to do anything for most players or help you out ratings-wise, but know that I like it and would enjoy a story like this in a much broader scope

From here on out no matter what happens with the level at least I know creators who I have a great respect and admiration for like you really enjoyed the story I was trying to tell. It makes all the hard work worth it.



I kind of liked what you did with the "shock" moment better than the tears now... but it is more fitting conceptually. That was a very Treasure-looking design.

lol, well I wanted to make something a bit more complex and add some original gameplay here but that ethereal Yorva still makes an apperance at the DESTINY section.


I really like the vehicle's control scheme and what you do with it, I have since you first showed it to me... I just don't like that it's a basic black square with decorations. I also think you should keep the music going right there, because the pace really slows to a crawl at that point and the lull of sound doesn't fit to me.

I am limilted here by the necessity to have the car as a square shape (to accomodate both the player and the controls) as well as the size to make it all work (including cam zones). I really don't know what else I can do other then add more decoration lol. I wanted the car to be black to blend into the background but I am open to any suggestions.

As for music I actually have an MGS track that kicks in here. Did it not activate for you? Let me know.


Is the apple supposed to symbolize the forbidden fruit of knowledge and a foreshadowing of things to come? lol, if so you're a conceptual genius.

I knew that if there was only one person who would understand some of the symbolism it would be you lol. So to answer your question, yes. The snake also plays into this symbolism.


When the bridge fell, I had a little trouble getting on top of it... see if you can slant down, or round off the back of his head to make sure players can do it with a single, regular jump from any spot on the beak.

Thanks for pointing this out, I will do some tweaking tonight.

Thanks for taking the time to leave all this feedback man. You really are one of the most talented creators out there so your words mean a lot.

__________________________________________________ __


OCK, glad to see you published this! Finally. d:

I'll give it a shot during the week when I can! Got so much stuff to do. >_<;

Thanks aer0. You know how much I respect and admire your talent so I really look forward to your thoughts.

___________________________________________



pretty pictures are always a nice way to get me to look at a level - i'll be sure to give this a shot in the morning!

Thanks MrGenji and I look forward to your thoughts. I actuall played Heist 2 and really enjoyed it but did not have the time to leave feedback yet, I will do so soon:)


Thanks once again to everyone who has/will play, commented and hearted, I really appreciate it. I will be doing an update this evening based on all the fantastic fedback I have recieved :)

Yarbone
02-03-2009, 04:44 AM
I won't make a second level for at least 2 months... i'm still working on solidplace >__> Maybe you could give some feedback once i made the additions :)

OCK
02-03-2009, 05:10 AM
I won't make a second level for at least 2 months... i'm still working on solidplace >__> Maybe you could give some feedback once i made the additions :)


Sounds good, let me know when it's done :)

Mrgenji
02-03-2009, 01:37 PM
Right I just tried it and I'm here with some feedback, I'm generally going to echo what the people above me have said - Story good, wall of text bad, Lighting good, Camera zones bad

Here area few points as I was playing through that crossed my mind:

-ONE-SHOT! In 2 places where you have emitters the switch the activated them should be set to one-shot. Mainly in the section where you have to do the logic puzzle and where you have to fire the orb into the moon. One shot on the button will mean the ball wont keep emitting if you stand on the button. One shot on the moon section will mean you don't get those moments where the orb isnt fired when you hit the target.

-That logic puzzle was very fun, in fact I would happily play a whole set of levels based around the same design

-Use of explosives....explosives don't discriminate between layers, in the two bosses that use rockets you can get caught easily by a rocket at the checkpoints. Especially the area with the totems.

-DESTINY, combining the paint ball launcher with the wall hugging car is pure genius. I really loved this section, but as others have said the car needs to go backwards as well as forwards. On 2 sections I almost had to kill myself because the instructions kicked in too late. By that time I was almost out of range of what I had to do!

-Camera Zones, Ah yes as people have said the static zones need a bit of work. I generally only use static zones if the player needs to see more than one thing as one (like say your logic puzzle). In several areas of tis level they seemed to serve no purpose and during the boss battle with the snake thing its possible to get shot while you cant see the boss. This really is one of my pet peeves, you MUST be able to see the boss before he sees you!

- The wall of text at the end, ahh this is a big no in my books. I dont have a problem with a lot of text, but I dont like a lot of text that makes you sit still and read it. reading through 20 or so speech bubbles where just standing there can get dull. Space them out a little down a corridor with pictures showing what the story is about, hell put them in a corridor with some nice lighting. This way the player can move from section to section and slowly uncover each part of the story - rather than having to read through it all at once in a never ending landslide of words.

-The whole theme of illusion was very nice, a very surreal - I like it

-On the section where it asked me how many animals there were on the earth....errr? I dont remember ever seeing the earth, did I miss something?

Anyway thats all I can think of for now - good level though, just needs a bit of tweaking (mainly with mechanics) here and there and it'll sparkle

4 stars

If you want to post feedback on HEIST 2 that would be great, but don't worry If you don't want to

mrsupercomputer
02-03-2009, 05:53 PM
Just finished the level and I enjoyed it. You can tell that you put a lot of thought and care into your story and the world that you create. Kudos for that. I'm not always that big on the multiple text bubbles and tons of story, but I must admit that you got me interested and I'm curious as to what happens next.

Pros:
Creative and well told story.
Good paintinator combat.
Clever puzzles.
Lighting used in many creative ways to give a very unique look and feel. Very dream like.
Left me wanting more.

Cons:
I found the Destiny section to be my least favorite part. I thought the idea was interesting and I liked your vehicle, but it was just a tad frustrating.
Camera angles (others have already pointed this out, so I'm sure you're still tweaking)
As clever as the Moon and the Orb puzzle was, I had a difficult time actually pulling off, but from some other comments, it looks like that was just me.

As always, Ock, you have created a very fun level that will definitely please thouse LBP players who love story. The gameplay and cameras could use a few tweaks, but those a very minor issues in an otherwise engaging experience.

Well done.

Takelow
02-03-2009, 06:28 PM
Hi OCK,

I finally found the time to write my thought about your last production, 218.

First of all, i would like to say that your level is a typically OCK level! And actually, it is a big compliment coming from me. I think that it is really important for a creator to conserve a consistency in artistical works, because it is a basis. I think that it is a very good sign when you can immediately identify the authors of an artistic creation: it means that the creator free its spirit, and put a part of it in its level. It is clearly your case, OCK.

I loved a lot playing your level, even if i had before playtesting the first parts (and btw, thank you for this privelege!!). As you mentionned, i had few bug during my first plays but you immediately corrected them and i could finish this extroardinary level.
Here are my detailed comments:

PROS:
-Storyline. It is your speciality, and this level is at the top of the mountain. You developped an incredibly rich story background, that progressively answer the questions. Where am i? Why? What is 218? Earth? EaRTh? eArth?
It is really great!
PLEASE, don't read the following if you didn't play the level yet:I particulary loved the way you mixed fantasy and historical facts. Talking about Einstein for exemple, was, in the context of your story, purely genious!!! The 218 explanation as an important date is also great!
-Visuals. The whole level looks great and as always, you put very detailed custom elements. I particularly loved the design of the first room (custom pseye stickers are great here...but please, give us here a reference to "2001, A Space Odyssey", as a cinephile i would greatly appreciate such a detail).
-Gameplay is good in general. There is a lot of different elements. I particulary loved the training room. The second one is very ingenious and i found this section "out of the time, out of the space" if you see what i mean...
- Your title screen is.... you already know how i love that ;)
-Your use of colored stickers is very appropriate (the temple is very beautiful)
-I loved a lot the background you used for the source of energy. The white gaz is very well used (btw, how did you that? How can you block people to die here?)
-The Snake is AWESOME and i loved the way he spits out his venom.
- This level is probably the one that made the best use of obligatory death. Your teleportation ideas very good.
- The "Do you not see?" screen is AWESOME!!! I must admit that i stay in the elevator during 3 or 4 minutes (three or five up/down) just to see this!
- The final section is great in term of concept, lights and visual. I loved the car principle. The section with the sun and the stars is just jaw-drapping!!!
I loved the "Oz" reference and found the garden transition great.
-Your use of light is very impressive here OCK. I loved the way you used all sources of lights available in the game to give an atmosphere to your level. The first robot is perfectly illuminated, your spotlight use is clever, beautiful and very artistic all along the level. I loved the movements you added in your lights. And the "Do you not see?" is....WOW

SUGGESTS:
-During room 3, i often die without seeing what have killed me. It is not a big problem at start buit became a little bit irritating at the last step of the fight (shooting the brain). I found that it was hard to precisely aim here. However, it could be only me, because i am mainly a creator and my play skills are very
-I found the temple structure great and visual appropriates, but i think you could add here mor visual elements in the background. There is discrepencies between detailed and very colored front element and only black back elements. It the same in a previous section (when you climb rocks and where the background is also black). I think you could add at least some colored lights (green and pink) in the background of the temple and some white lights in the background of the rock mountain to simulate stars.
- I have a similar remark for the tearer section. Gameplay and puzzles are great, but i think you could ameliorate the whole visual here. Perhaps could you just draw a slight face on the wall to reinforce this aspect.
- The title screen is great (and this 218 too), but i found the "218" stickers less well made (perhaps a simple question of size) althought we see them a lot in your level. I know it is a subjective fact, but perhaps could you made a more clean 218 stickers to remplace the present one.
- Why.... Why are we forced to wait before playing the next part?????

To conclude this long-and very bad written-post, i think this level is a Masterpiece OCK!
5 stars, hearted!
BTW, OCK is the only 100% hearted creator that i know. I mean that i hearted him as creator and i also hearted the 3 levels he created.
I'm now very very anxious to know more about your next productions ;)

bindibaji
02-03-2009, 08:46 PM
Thanks although I have to ask, if this is not a 5 star level then what is?

It's more to do with the amount of txt you had in your level. I appreciate the story but I prefer my levels with alot less txt.

Gilgamesh
02-04-2009, 01:15 AM
Hey, that's a pretty amazing level OCK. As others have said, your style really shows through. :)

I liked the variety in the challenges and the fact that you made some major improvements on making the text easy to follow. The teleporter was also a nice addition.

There's a couple of points that could use some improvement though.

There was a section where the text suggests we drop the Paintinator in order to grab a key to pass to the next section. I found that I could quite simply push the key by walking into it and keep the Paintinator during the next section.

I had a similar event with the two teary eyes. After pulling the switch, I found that I could go to the right corner where the Paintinator and the green eye remained (I could then use the Paintinator later to quite safely try all of the buttons for the quiz from a distance). In this section I could also jump out from behind the wall by jumping in the middle where there's a tiny square block instead of having to go all the way left.

Speaking of the Paintinator, the chasm section is brutal, which is not bad. The problem I found is that I could quite happily sit waaay back at the left and fire the Paintinator off-screen to destroy everything. You might want to either put a low wall (maybe invisible) or a tall column in the middle layer to keep us from being able to fire from way back there, or emit a wall of gas or dark matter behind us to keep us from actually going back too far.

The vehicle section was fairly straightforward, but I really wish I could see more of what was going on. I just tended to fire blindly into the air and hope I hit something.

Keep up the good work, definitely worth a 5-star and heart. :)

OCK
02-04-2009, 01:59 AM
MrGenji - Thanks for all the feedback.


Story good, wall of text bad, Lighting good, Camera zones bad

lol. First of all a "wall of text" was necessary in order to flesh out the story that you consider "good". In regards to camera zones it seems that opinions are mixed although calling my cam zones "bad" is a bit of an insult. Most creators don't take the time to use a lot of camera zones to really add cinematic flair to their levels and I clearly try my best to do so although they are not always perfect.



-ONE-SHOT! In 2 places where you have emitters the switch the activated them should be set to one-shot. Mainly in the section where you have to do the logic puzzle and where you have to fire the orb into the moon. One shot on the button will mean the ball wont keep emitting if you stand on the button. One shot on the moon section will mean you don't get those moments where the orb isnt fired when you hit the target.

Thanks for the suggestion, I will test it out an see if it is more efficient :)


Use of explosives....explosives don't discriminate between layers, in the two bosses that use rockets you can get caught easily by a rocket at the checkpoints. Especially the area with the totems.

The use of cover here is important. If you are standing behind cover then it is pretty much impossible for the rockets to hit you (and I mean literally 1cm away from the cover). By the "totem" area (why totem) I assume you mean the bridge? I am not sure when you played the level but I moved a checkpoint from the overhang of the bridge up next to the other one so this problem has already been solved :)


This really is one of my pet peeves, you MUST be able to see the boss before he sees you!

lol, I will work on the cam zone here or simply adjust the radius of my prox switch.


The wall of text at the end, ahh this is a big no in my books. I dont have a problem with a lot of text, but I dont like a lot of text that makes you sit still and read it. reading through 20 or so speech bubbles where just standing there can get dull. Space them out a little down a corridor with pictures showing what the story is about, hell put them in a corridor with some nice lighting. This way the player can move from section to section and slowly uncover each part of the story - rather than having to read through it all at once in a never ending landslide of words.


Everything that happens towards the end regarding the story and how it is told is very much intentional and I have no plans on changing it. I created that final Yorva as a story-telling device but also as eye-candy for the player to admire. By that point you should be very engaged in the story and if you are not then either you don't appreciate a great story or you don't like the particular story I was trying to tell. Either way, there is nothing I can do about it. If you read some of the other comments of such accomplished creators as NinjaMicWZ or Jaeyden you will see that they actually loved this part of the level and enjoyed how the story was fleshed out here. I am sorry you did not feel the same way.


-On the section where it asked me how many animals there were on the earth....errr? I dont remember ever seeing the earth, did I miss something?

When you enter the Yorva's planet there is a cutscene showing a "scene of Earth" in the background. Did you somehow miss this? This puzzle was meant to test the players memory and I really wanted them to think back on the picture. Getting the answer right on the first attempt rewards you with extra point bubbles!


Thanks for all your feedback. I have already played HEIST 2 and I will leave you feedback soon.

__________________________________________________ _______

Mrsupercomputer - Thanks for all the feedback.


I'm not always that big on the multiple text bubbles and tons of story, but I must admit that you got me interested and I'm curious as to what happens next.

Thanks for this. I know not all players want to play something so story-driven (another reason they should tweak the search engines to include level type) but my goal was to create a story so good that it would grab the player who would not then mind reading through all that text. I am happy that in your case I suceeded.




I found the Destiny section to be my least favorite part. I thought the idea was interesting and I liked your vehicle, but it was just a tad frustrating.

Well you are the first person to say this so I really don't know what to tell you lol. I have said it once and I will say it again: it is impossible to satisfy everybody. I personally think this area has some of the most innovative gameplay I have seen in LBP (and trust me I would be saying that even if the level were not mine, I always give credit where it's due) so I am sorry it did not impress you.


As always, Ock, you have created a very fun level that will definitely please thouse LBP players who love story. The gameplay and cameras could use a few tweaks, but those a very minor issues in an otherwise engaging experience.

Thanks but I think this level should also please those who admire original gameplay. I think I have done a lot in this regards with my training rooms, picture puzzle, tear room and DESTINY. The emphasis on great gameplay is just as strong for me as the story and visuals.

Thanks for checking it out and leaving feedback. I look forward to your next project, you know how much I loved Mulberry Woods :)


__________________________________________________ ____

Takelow - Thank you for all of your comments.


First of all, i would like to say that your level is a typically OCK level! And actually, it is a big compliment coming from me. I think that it is really important for a creator to conserve a consistency in artistical works, because it is a basis. I think that it is a very good sign when you can immediately identify the authors of an artistic creation: it means that the creator free its spirit, and put a part of it in its level. It is clearly your case, OCK.

I am so happy you mentioned this, it really makes me feel great. I think it is a big compliment when you can identify who made a level because the style is so distinct. You also fall into this category of creators so thanks again for that.


I loved a lot playing your level, even if i had before playtesting the first parts (and btw, thank you for this privelege!!). As you mentionned, i had few bug during my first plays but you immediately corrected them and i could finish this extroardinary level.


Thank you for accepting the offer to test, I appreciate it. And a big thank you for sending me a message on PSN when you encountered the bugs that allowed me to fix them immediately :)


(custom pseye stickers are great here...but please, give us here a reference to "2001, A Space Odyssey", as a cinephile i would greatly appreciate such a detail).

lol. Because you asked I will do it (I love that movie btw, a true masterpiece)!


I loved a lot the background you used for the source of energy. The white gaz is very well used (btw, how did you that? How can you block people to die here?)


I am glad you point this out because it is actually one of my favorite parts of the level. I used both gas AND an electrified background plus an LED to create the bloom. You cannot jump into the background which is a wall of gas because the game treats it as it does a regular, solid wall.


The "Do you not see?" screen is AWESOME!!! I must admit that i stay in the elevator during 3 or 4 minutes (three or five up/down) just to see this!

Wow, thank you! I really wanted to throw as much visual stimulation at the player as I could throughout the level and I really like what I came up with here.


The section with the sun and the stars is just jaw-drapping!!!

Thanks for pointing this out as it took a bit of time to create. I don't know if people realize that the rays of the sun are constantly spinning at a very high speed which gives the spotlights a super-flashing quality.


Your use of light is very impressive here OCK. I loved the way you used all sources of lights available in the game to give an atmosphere to your level. The first robot is perfectly illuminated, your spotlight use is clever, beautiful and very artistic all along the level. I loved the movements you added in your lights. And the "Do you not see?" is....WOW


I must point out again that you were a major inspiration behind all the lighting I put into this level so this compliment means the world to me, thank you.


During room 3, i often die without seeing what have killed me. It is not a big problem at start buit became a little bit irritating at the last step of the fight (shooting the brain). I found that it was hard to precisely aim here.

I did not want to make things too easy here lol. You have to jump in and out of the background and aim precisely at the gap where it's brain is. Practice makes perfect :)



I found the temple structure great and visual appropriates, but i think you could add here mor visual elements in the background. There is discrepencies between detailed and very colored front element and only black back elements. It the same in a previous section (when you climb rocks and where the background is also black). I think you could add at least some colored lights (green and pink) in the background of the temple and some white lights in the background of the rock mountain to simulate stars.


I was thinking about this yesterday and although I do not really want to decorate the background I will definitely add some lighting here.


i found the "218" stickers less well made (perhaps a simple question of size) althought we see them a lot in your level. I know it is a subjective fact, but perhaps could you made a more clean 218 stickers to remplace the present one.

I agree 100%.


Why.... Why are we forced to wait before playing the next part?????

Because I must first work on another project ;) ;) ;) ;) ;) ;)


To conclude this long-and very bad written-post, i think this level is a Masterpiece OCK!
5 stars, hearted!
BTW, OCK is the only 100% hearted creator that i know. I mean that i hearted him as creator and i also hearted the 3 levels he created.

Wow, thanks for this. You, NinjaMicWZ and Jaeyden are the creators I have hearted most so it is good to know that I also fall into this category for at least one other person lol. Thanks again for all of your feedback. It means a lot and I appreciate it.

__________________________________________________ _________

Gilgamesh - Thank you for all of your comments.


major improvements on making the text easy to follow.

lol. A big thanks to you and Kapbam for mentioning this in The Legion. From the start I kept your comments in my mind and made sure all my text began with a new sentence and ended in a period.


There was a section where the text suggests we drop the Paintinator in order to grab a key to pass to the next section. I found that I could quite simply push the key by walking into it and keep the Paintinator during the next section.

This is true and the only reason the speech bubble is in there is for the one-in-a-hundred player who might be running around wondering how to progress :)


I had a similar event with the two teary eyes. After pulling the switch, I found that I could go to the right corner where the Paintinator and the green eye remained (I could then use the Paintinator later to quite safely try all of the buttons for the quiz from a distance). In this section I could also jump out from behind the wall by jumping in the middle where there's a tiny square block instead of having to go all the way left.


Thank you, thank you, thank you! This is the kind of feedback that is most useful to me. I will do some tweaking tonight.


Speaking of the Paintinator, the chasm section is brutal, which is not bad. The problem I found is that I could quite happily sit waaay back at the left and fire the Paintinator off-screen to destroy everything. You might want to either put a low wall (maybe invisible) or a tall column in the middle layer to keep us from being able to fire from way back there, or emit a wall of gas or dark matter behind us to keep us from actually going back too far.

Very good point, I will tweak this too :)


The vehicle section was fairly straightforward, but I really wish I could see more of what was going on

As I mentioned in previous posts the cam zones here are incredibly difficult to tweak and I don't think I can ever make them "perfect". I think where shooting sections are concerned the cam zones work fine and I always have it zoomed out to show the eye-candy I put in there. Beyond that there really is not much more I can do.


Keep up the good work, definitely worth a 5-star and heart.

Thanks a lot for this. It is always great when I creator who's work I admire enjoys what I have made :)


Thanks once again for all who have played/hearted/commented. I will be doing a big update tonight :)

mrsupercomputer
02-04-2009, 02:49 AM
Thanks but I think this level should also please those who admire original gameplay. I think I have done a lot in this regards with my training rooms, picture puzzle, tear room and DESTINY. The emphasis on great gameplay is just as strong for me as the story and visuals.

Just wanted to let you know that by no means did I mean to imply that it didn't. I thought the gameplay was great! I just wanted to emphasize how much story nuts will love it! You probably realized that's what I meant, but I just wanted to make sure!:p

OCK
02-04-2009, 01:00 PM
Just wanted to let you know that by no means did I mean to imply that it didn't. I thought the gameplay was great! I just wanted to emphasize how much story nuts will love it! You probably realized that's what I meant, but I just wanted to make sure!:p

No problem and thanks for taking the time to clarify :)

UPDATE

- Increased lifetime on stairs in first training room by a couple of seconds. I got a couple of in-game comments saying the stairs disappeared to fast *sigh*

- Changed both the swicthes on both orb puzzles to one-shot (thanks MrGenji)

- Increased the size and changed the color of the square key after first boss to make it stand out more (thanks Yarbone)

- Added a sound effect to teleportation sequence (still need to calibrate it but thanks Yarbone)

- Added some really cool new lighting at the start of the Yorva planet (thanks Takelow)

- Adjusted the prox switch during snake boss so it does not fire until the player has saw it and has had time to react (thanks MrGenji)

- Made it impossible to jump into the square block in the foreground of the tear room thereby allowing the player to bypass second set of tears (thanks Gilgamesh)

- Added a forced death after glass slide in case player still has a paintinator (thanks Gilgamesh)

- Changed the lighting after the galss slide to make it more pretty

I am still working on the other suggestions, I just wanted to get the important stuff out of the way and do some minor visual tweaks.

Thanks once again to all who have played/commented/hearted, I really do appreciate it.

Mrgenji
02-04-2009, 01:26 PM
In regards to camera zones it seems that opinions are mixed although calling my cam zones "bad" is a bit of an insult.

Ive noticed you seem to get insulted very easily, I'm not saying that all the camera angles were bad - but I found the majority of them bad or pointless, its mainly preference, a lot of them seemed to be there for no reason other than to have a camera angle there. I put that section about this = good this = bad as a quick way to try and not repeat what everyone has said before me.


By the "totem" area (why totem) I assume you mean the bridge? I am not sure when you played the level but I moved a checkpoint from the overhang of the bridge up next to the other one so this problem has already been solved

They reminded me of totem poles for some reason, one of them looked like a bird to me heh, I must have played the level before you moved the checkpoint then as I died a lot at that checkpoint.


Everything that happens towards the end regarding the story and how it is told is very much intentional and I have no plans on changing it. I created that final Yorva as a story-telling device but also as eye-candy for the player to admire. By that point you should be very engaged in the story and if you are not then either you don't appreciate a great story or you don't like the particular story I was trying to tell. Either way, there is nothing I can do about it. If you read some of the other comments of such accomplished creators as NinjaMicWZ or Jaeyden you will see that they actually loved this part of the level and enjoyed how the story was fleshed out here. I am sorry you did not feel the same way.

I dont know why you feel you have to zealously defend your story, if you publish a level with lots of text your going to get people complain about it anyway. Still my problem wasn't with the content (I enjoyed the story) or the amount, I dont mind reading it, but my point was about the delivery of the text. I just feel after such an artistic level to have the entire story dumped on you at the end almost as if saying "Oh by the way, heres the story - now go the scoreboard" seems a little...cheap.


When you enter the Yorva's planet there is a cutscene showing a "scene of Earth" in the background. Did you somehow miss this? This puzzle was meant to test the players memory and I really wanted them to think back on the picture. Getting the answer right on the first attempt rewards you with extra point bubbles!

I totaly missed this scene, was it when you had to look out of the window? or when you first got teleported to the planet?

either way I saw no cutscene

CCubbage
02-04-2009, 11:39 PM
Ummm.... I liked the wall of text so much I used this technique in my next level....

Hey... I have an idea... maybe at the beginning of the level you can have a switch: Switch left - text bubbles active, switch right - text bubbles inactive.

And at the end of the game if the player chose no text bubbles a great big block can fall on their head.

Just a thought (and only if you have the thermo)...

dorien
02-05-2009, 03:41 AM
Right Just like to say that I just spent ages writing a review for you on this and the missus just got up to change the babies nappy and ask me turn on the lamp. BUT!!!!!! I turned the PC off instead of the lamp on:grr: lol

So now I've quickly turned it back on and warmed it up again, your getting the short version as it's 3:09am here and I need sleep :D

As you probably know if you have seen my PSN message, I love this level and the story really gripped me.
I don't usually like loads of text bubbles to read through but in this level it really didn't bother me at all. And I for one will be waiting for the developments of the next instalment.

It looks like you have addressed a lot of the problems mentioned in this thread (as I like to read every post in a thread before making a reply, which took a while :))
But just to go over a few of my niggles VVVVVVV

Direction was mentioned earlier and I would just like to say that I got very frustrated at the beginning in the first room (which was graphically great btw) as I didn't realise it was an elevator at the end and only after jumping in and out a few times and going back to the bed, looking at the pictures and playing with the apple thinking I missed some sort of puzzle. That I actually got into the elevator and grabbed by mistake and it started to move.
(BUT THAT'S PROBABLY JUST ME HAVING A DUMB BLOND MOMENT :p)

I didn't see the button on the moon/orb puzzle (don't think it's actually visible with the cam placement???) and just kept shooting at stuff until I figured out that there was a button that emitted the orb. (AGAIN MAYBE JUST ME)

I also like to read the text bubbles slowly and make sure I take everything in, but missed some at one point. I think it was at the end of the vehicle section by the gardens when you are killed to place you bellow????
Which annoyed me as I loved the story so much and couldn't press triangle to see what I missed as I was taken to another place and was no longer in the radius :(

Those were just some very minor niggles to what was one of the best levels I have played. As always with you, your level was polished to a very high standard and the gripping story, lighting, visuals and the uniqueness of the puzzles really sets this level apart from all the mediocre levels out there.


This level really is an experience and I would recommend it to anyone :)

5*'s, hearted, TAGGED Brilliant and left a comment

GREAT WORK AGAIN MAN :D

Voltiare
02-05-2009, 03:42 AM
YouTube - Japanese TV-Show, Human Tetris

Watch it til the 1 minute mark and prepare to lose your mind.

dorien
02-05-2009, 03:45 AM
YouTube - Japanese TV-Show, Human Tetris (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9vm2gLk8xk&feature=rec-HM-r2)

Watch it til the 1 minute mark and prepare to lose your mind.

LOL the 218 is spreading fast :)

Ozwald_the_cat
02-05-2009, 05:16 AM
Hey Ock,

Haven't had a chance to turn on LBP between the day you put out 218 and now so here is my longer review:

Pros:
+Visuals, you turn LBP levels into an art form. Angles, Lighting, Colors all work together to give a cinematic impact.
+Puzzles, Liked the shooting tears and agility puzzle, loved the lever/ball puzzle (as someone else said, I'd play a level of just this sort of game) it is a better puzzle now that you have switched up the order of the switchs compared to the first time I played it.
+The Cobra Boss, A lot of paintinator levels/boss are total spray&prays where it takes no thought to beat them, I liked how you had to time going in and out of layers to shoot it. Original and fun IMO.

Cons
All the cons are minor compared to how good the pros are, but here are the things that made me scratch my head
-The "how many animals are on earth" question. Played the level 4 times before I actually figured out where you get the answer from, I would have said "animals on the simulation of earth" or how ever you worded it when you were on that scene
-Dying before the 'Tears' puzzle, was an unfun way to drop a paintonator. I liked your 'grab here' solution or the new gas cloud death you added that states the reason I died. The current solution makes me feel like I screwed something up.


I'm kinda inbetween the love/hate of the 'walls of text' The use of camera angles 'epic', an 18 bubbles denumant...little over the top.

5/5 heart and Artistic tag

CCubbage
02-05-2009, 07:44 PM
I would HATE to see a single sentence disappear here. I totally understand and see the dilemma: a bunch of separate bubbles popping up. But, I went back and played this game 3 times. I carefully read every single bubble. It's well written, and for the game to truly be complete needs to be there. I can tell OCK had it planned, put it where it needs to be, and I can understand why he wants to leave it.

The problem isn't really with the text, it's the amount of text you can put in a SINGLE TEXT BUBBLE. If you take every single bubble that OCK has here and you string them together, we're only talking about a couple paragraphs. If the text were sitting on a single piece of paper, would you REALLY have a problem with reading it?

Hopefully at some point MM will allow the ability to easily create a bulletin board or scrolling text box. This would really solve the problem because you could not only have the text, but could present it in a way that will be more dramatic to the player.

Snowspot
02-05-2009, 11:17 PM
Couldn't he use stickers and write something on a big billboard or something? I haven't done something like that so I don't know :P If you wrote everything with stickers it would be time consuming but the you could have it scroll by in the background or something too.

If you created 26 little boards, then wrote letters on each of them with the stickers tool. Then it would be really easy to cut and paste each one into creating the bigger billboard with all the words.

=-o


Or... ya know.. you could suck it up and just make a long corridor and spread out the text. At least then the character is doing something.

Samson107
02-05-2009, 11:48 PM
looks great i will give it a go

CCubbage
02-06-2009, 03:15 AM
The sticker thing was my original intent for one of my games. It sounded REALLY cool. But in practice it kind of stunk... I ended up using the magic mouths after a while... (of course I'm the first to admit that someone else may be more skilled at this than me - such as Samson107, but right now the magic mouth seems to be the most plausible).

Besides, my personal feeling is that I (gasp) LIKE the text. If you sit and read it, you are only taking about 20 seconds. If you don't want the text, you can hit the continue button REALLY FAST and be done with it in about 5 seconds.

My only complaint is really with MM that they limit the amount of text in a bubble so much.


Besides... even if you don't like the text bubbles, is it THAT big of a deal? Isn't the rest of this level amazingly cool enough to allow a 20 second slow down???? Are we really that jaded that this will ruin the experience? When was the last time you sat through a movie that was 100% action and NEVER let up to have a chat?

Ok... deep breath...


By the way, if we talk about the magic mouth text long enough this thread may become the most-read showcase thread in LBPCentral history.... if you're so worried about text bubbles, HOW COME YOU'RE STILL READING THIS!

Maraz_Matari
02-06-2009, 03:38 AM
I'll be playing this level this weekend. :) looks promising.

OCK
02-06-2009, 01:30 PM
Ummm.... I liked the wall of text so much I used this technique in my next level....

Hey... I have an idea... maybe at the beginning of the level you can have a switch: Switch left - text bubbles active, switch right - text bubbles inactive.

And at the end of the game if the player chose no text bubbles a great big block can fall on their head.

Just a thought (and only if you have the thermo)...
__________________


Thanks for this, I hope people get it... :)

__________________________________________________ __________

Dorien - Thanks for taking the time to leave all this feedback, especially since your newest addition to the family is probably taking up most of your time :)


Direction was mentioned earlier and I would just like to say that I got very frustrated at the beginning in the first room (which was graphically great btw) as I didn't realise it was an elevator at the end and only after jumping in and out a few times and going back to the bed, looking at the pictures and playing with the apple thinking I missed some sort of puzzle. That I actually got into the elevator and grabbed by mistake and it started to move.

I am surprised at this but perhaps I will add a speech bubble telling the player that is an elevator.


I didn't see the button on the moon/orb puzzle (don't think it's actually visible with the cam placement???) and just kept shooting at stuff until I figured out that there was a button that emitted the orb.

That has to be just you since no one else mentioned it and as far as I am concerned the switch is clearly visible lol. I even intentionally shone the red spotlight straight up so as to indicate exactly where the button is :)





I also like to read the text bubbles slowly and make sure I take everything in, but missed some at one point. I think it was at the end of the vehicle section by the gardens when you are killed to place you bellow????
Which annoyed me as I loved the story so much and couldn't press triangle to see what I missed as I was taken to another place and was no longer in the radius

I am a fast reader but I thought I still gave the average player sufficient time to read through all the text. When I read through it then I still have 10 seconds before the forced death occurs. I am curious to knw if anyone else has had the problem because if so then I will definitely slow things down.



Those were just some very minor niggles to what was one of the best levels I have played. As always with you, your level was polished to a very high standard and the gripping story, lighting, visuals and the uniqueness of the puzzles really sets this level apart from all the mediocre levels out there.


This level really is an experience and I would recommend it to anyone

5*'s, hearted, TAGGED Brilliant and left a comment


Thanks so much for this, it really means a lot. I really do appreciate all this feedback :)

__________________________________________________ _

Voltiare -



Watch it til the 1 minute mark and prepare to lose your mind.

Thanks for making my day, that really made me smile. How in the world did you find that?

__________________________________________________ __________________

Ozwald - Thanks for all thsi feedback, I really appreciate it. Thank you for all the praise, it means a lot but I would like to have a look at your cons because ultimately that is what will help me improve the level.



The "how many animals are on earth" question. Played the level 4 times before I actually figured out where you get the answer from, I would have said "animals on the simulation of earth" or how ever you worded it when you were on that scene

I agree 100% and I have added another sppech bubble here :)


Dying before the 'Tears' puzzle, was an unfun way to drop a paintonator. I liked your 'grab here' solution or the new gas cloud death you added that states the reason I died. The current solution makes me feel like I screwed something up.

Thanks for pointing this out. I did not think it was such a big deal but perhaps I will add another speech bubble saying "no cheating 218" or something like that.


5/5 heart and Artistic tag


Thanks a lot for this, I appreciate it.

__________________________________________________ ___

Ccubbage - Thank you for your continued support of this lvl.


I would HATE to see a single sentence disappear here.

So would I and for that reason none will :)



The problem isn't really with the text, it's the amount of text you can put in a SINGLE TEXT BUBBLE. If you take every single bubble that OCK has here and you string them together, we're only talking about a couple paragraphs. If the text were sitting on a single piece of paper, would you REALLY have a problem with reading it?


I am really happy you point this out. I have been wishing for bigger speech bubbles ever since I started The Legion and I can't understand why MM has not done an update adding such a simple feature. I guess we have no choice but to wait patiently.

Thanks again for your comments, I appreciate it.


UPDATE

- Changed around some of my stickers and added a massive Earth Sticker with a black background in the yellow frame after the second training room which looks 10X better then the original pic (cray super computer but you knew that already right @_@)

- Added some really cool eye candy when descending on the elevator

- Decorated both the car in training room 1 and DESTINY. The both look 10X better now (thanks Yarbone, Voltiare)

- Added speech bubble to earth puzzle (thanks Ozwald and MrGenji)

- Tweaked cam zone in Garden (thanks Jaeyden) and removed camzone in "rainbow area"

- Imbedded some cool looking Yorva logos into the glass columns in the final corridor

- Fixed some rough edges with the corner editor

Thnaks once again to all who have played/hearted/commented, I really appreciate it.

On another note the level has fallen to 3 stars. I guess someone had nothing better to do then start pelting my lvl with 1 star ratings. It is very frustrating but there really isn't much I can do about it. It certainly did not motivate me to start my next creation though.

I look forward to more people's thoughts, please check out the level if you get a chance :)

mostevilmilo
02-06-2009, 03:07 PM
This is a great level. And it's cool how the story makes the level move forward. Bravo! :)

CCubbage
02-06-2009, 03:23 PM
You know, you're in good company with the 3-star rating. Some of the most fantastic and beautiful creations in LittleBigPlanet are 3-star... It's disheartening, but definately has absolutely nothing to do with quality. I think it has more to do with crossing from straight entertainment into art.

I think LittleBigPlanet for crybabies said it all.

I've got a great idea - we should have a community project where everyone here goes in and puts 5 stars on this level! I'll give a hundred of my experience points away to the person that manages to get it up to 4 stars so we can guarrantee the sequel!




OOOH... I FOUND A BUG... In the final area with all the text bubbles you spelled "destructive" wrong!

Dimo1138
02-06-2009, 10:04 PM
Hey, haven't finished the level yet but wanted to come by with what I've got so far. At the risk of sounding repetitive, issues I had mostly have to do with certain camera angles and the vehicle section. Having no reverse mechanism on the vehicle makes it a little aggravating. The cameras is an over all general statement, there were a few points where it was an issue. On the plus side, there were definitely some good looks in this level as well as some good combat (I love killing things that people make lol). I'll be back in a bit once I finished playing this level in its entirety to leave more comprehensive feedback.

OCK
02-07-2009, 02:06 PM
This is a great level. And it's cool how the story makes the level move forward. Bravo!

Thanks for checking it out and for your kind words, I appreciate it :)



You know, you're in good company with the 3-star rating. Some of the most fantastic and beautiful creations in LittleBigPlanet are 3-star... It's disheartening, but definately has absolutely nothing to do with quality. I think it has more to do with crossing from straight entertainment into art.

Good point, I am trying not to let it get to me too much.


I've got a great idea - we should have a community project where everyone here goes in and puts 5 stars on this level! I'll give a hundred of my experience points away to the person that manages to get it up to 4 stars so we can guarrantee the sequel!


Very kind of you but I promise a sequel will come at some point, just not in the near future :)



OOOH... I FOUND A BUG... In the final area with all the text bubbles you spelled "destructive" wrong!

lol, I will fix that the next time I am on, thanks.


Having no reverse mechanism on the vehicle makes it a little aggravating

I am open to suggestion on how to implement this without changing the size of the vehicle and keeping in mind that it is emitted and the room limitation in the interior.


On the plus side, there were definitely some good looks in this level as well as some good combat (I love killing things that people make lol). I'll be back in a bit once I finished playing this level in its entirety to leave more comprehensive feedback.


Thanks and I look forward to your further thoughts.

A big thanks once again to all who have played/commented/hearted, I appreciate it :)

Mrgenji
02-07-2009, 03:38 PM
Congrats on the spotlight mate, well earned - there needs to be more (good) story in LBP

CowTip
02-07-2009, 04:42 PM
Just wanted to say that I got to the point where you're supposed to shoot the orb into the moon and after the orb fired twice I couldn't get the button to work ever again no matter how many times I shot the button or what angle I shot it at. Otherwise the level's pretty nifty, but I'm a little sad I couldn't finish it hehe.

CCubbage
02-07-2009, 07:26 PM
Hmmm. I've personally never seen the gun break, but you can kill yourself and re-spawn a new one.

CowTip
02-07-2009, 07:44 PM
In that particular case it wasn't the vehicle or the gun itself that broke, it was the switch that you have to shoot to activate the sphere. I got it to work the two times, then shot at it for 10 minutes with nothing else ever being emitted. =/ Just to make sure, I did even respawn the vehicle and drive all the way back, but no go.

CCubbage
02-07-2009, 07:47 PM
Maybe you hit the fire button on your controller too hard
;)

Strange. But it is certainly possible. I've seen some interesting things happen in LBP physics.

OCK
02-08-2009, 05:47 AM
In that particular case it wasn't the vehicle or the gun itself that broke, it was the switch that you have to shoot to activate the sphere. I got it to work the two times, then shot at it for 10 minutes with nothing else ever being emitted. =/ Just to make sure, I did even respawn the vehicle and drive all the way back, but no go.

I am very sorry you experienced this and I really don't know what to tell you. I playtested the level close to 50x before publishing and I make it a point to run through at least once a day to try and find bugs I may have missed. I can honestly say that in all of my playthroughs this problem has never occured and it sounds like one of those things that happens every once in 100 plays.

Once again, I am sorry this prevented you from finishing the level but I hope the level was good enough to warrant another playthrough :)

Serpit
02-08-2009, 11:05 AM
The level was brilliant, from start to... the point that I reached, which sadly wasn't the finish >_> More on that later.

The atmosphere was just right. You had me as soon as my character started talking about the simulated sunlight. There's a desire to know and see more that instantly shows itself within the first 10 seconds of playing your level. Basically, it captures you, and as others have said, it's a cinematic experience.

The battles were great. I was amazed at how compley the training turret fight right at the beginning was. The puzzle that came afterwards was great as well, but you might mark the "exit" so players can at least see where they to guide the orb to. The battles on the alien planet were wonderful as well - varied and relatively challenging, plus good-looking.

The story itself was good as well. I enjoy it when little bits of information are revealed gradually, so I can try to put the puzzle together myself. It did start like a relatively generic sci-fi-story, but there's obviously much more to it than meets the eye.

Sadly, I couldn't finish it. I read some of the posts here and I think I fell victim to a bug. I made it to the end of the DESTINY ride, but when the ball of light came down and killed me, I returned to the beginning. I spawned a new vehicle, drove the whole route again and tried to drive into the ball of light, but again I died and was sent back to the beginning of the ride. I tried shooting everything on the screen, jumped out in front, but to no avail. I'll probably give it another shot later though to see the ending.

Anyway, overall a very nice level that I'd definitely recommend. I'd really appreciate it if you took a look at my level, "Timeless Village". I made an F4F thread on this board as well =)


Edit: Okay, can you please tell me what I'm doing wrong? I retried your level and exact same thing happened. Giant ball of light comes down, I died, back to the beginning of the DESTINY section. I REALLY want to see the ending though ;_;

OCK
02-09-2009, 12:14 AM
Thank you for all your feedback Serpit, I appreciate it.


The atmosphere was just right. You had me as soon as my character started talking about the simulated sunlight.

I am glad you point this out. I think my sunlight looks very realistic and it really sets the tone for the level :)


The puzzle that came afterwards was great as well, but you might mark the "exit" so players can at least see where they to guide the orb to.

Actually, I DO show the exit, it is just very subtle lol. The green spotlight shining towards the ceiling is showing where the orb should go. If I made it overly obvious I think it would take away any challenge the room provides.


The story itself was good as well. I enjoy it when little bits of information are revealed gradually, so I can try to put the puzzle together myself. It did start like a relatively generic sci-fi-story, but there's obviously much more to it than meets the eye.

Thanks so much for this and I am really sorry you did not get to finish the level because some very interesting things happen in the story towards the end.


Sadly, I couldn't finish it. I read some of the posts here and I think I fell victim to a bug. I made it to the end of the DESTINY ride, but when the ball of light came down and killed me, I returned to the beginning.

Now this I really can't understand. When you drive DESTINY into the Garden you automatically activate a checkpoint sitting on dissolve. When the foreground dissolves so does that support and the checkpoint hits a slide and falls to the end portion of the level. I have playtested "tagging" this checkpoint from every angle. In other words, I have held the white button on DESTINY from the left side, right side and bottom and the checkpoint activates everytime (I tested again after reading this and it worked from every angle). When did you play the level? I did some editing the other day and accidently blocked the checkpoint from falling. However I always playtest after a republish and when I saw the mistake I made I quickly fixed it. This is he only explanation I can come up with as to why you could not finish the level.



Anyway, overall a very nice level that I'd definitely recommend. I'd really appreciate it if you took a look at my level, "Timeless Village".

As you know I have already had a look and will be playing again soon at which point I will get back to your thread with extensive feedback.

Thanks again for all of your feedback, I appreciate it :)

iiiijujube
02-09-2009, 03:07 AM
The level overall had a very good and well designed atmosphere, however a few things kind of broke that. For example, the garden scene looks very hastily designed and not put together, as does the odd "hallway" with the fake earth that was a little confusing. All in all, though, I enjoyed it and hearted it.

Snowspot
02-09-2009, 08:24 AM
I have checked out this level a few times, each time something has broken. The first time it happened was the initial hallway. Me and another player grabbed onto that elevator that you "grab" to make go down. Well, somehow we both jumped out by mistake as it was halfway down. Since you can't jump backward and down at the same time, we had to restart. This is easily fixable.

Another part we got stuck on was the vehicle (destiny) part. 3 times we respawned after being stopped but we never got past that part.

Besides these complaints. One thing I noticed was that the first part of the level seems so much more well-planned than the rest. As soon as you touch down on "earth" things start to look very un-OCK-like. To me it seemed like your usual polish was not there and there are some strange camera problems.

I have noticed you constantly improving the level or changing things every time I play though. So I'm sure all this stuff will be addressed eventually.

Bottom line... the destiny part is giving people serious problems you might want to change parts of it. On top of that, for me it seemed kind of slow, the trip of destiny should be more exciting, it shouldn't be the trip of slowly inching along-ness.

If u feel like giving feedback the little big apocalypse 15 review thread would be great :D

OCK
02-09-2009, 01:02 PM
The level overall had a very good and well designed atmosphere, however a few things kind of broke that. For example, the garden scene looks very hastily designed and not put together, as does the odd "hallway" with the fake earth that was a little confusing. All in all, though, I enjoyed it and hearted it.

Thanks a lot for checking out the level and leaving feedback, I appreciate it. I am sorry you did not like the Garden although I can assure you that having spent 80+ hours on the level nothing was "hastily designed" lol. Thanks again and thanks for the heart. Let me know if you have a level you would like feedback on :)
_________________________

Snowspot, thank you for your comments.



The first time it happened was the initial hallway. Me and another player grabbed onto that elevator that you "grab" to make go down. Well, somehow we both jumped out by mistake as it was halfway down. Since you can't jump backward and down at the same time, we had to restart. This is easily fixable.


I really don't know what you mean here so please clarify. The elevator also has a checkpoint but maybe you did not notice that. Also keep in mind that the level was intended for SINGLE player so if people are playing this in pairs and horsing around that can (and usually will) diminish the gameplay experience. I designed the level for single player and that is how it is meant to be played. Hopefully MM will one day allow us to restrict how many people may enter the level.



Another part we got stuck on was the vehicle (destiny) part. 3 times we respawned after being stopped but we never got past that part.

Again, please clarify. Where did you get stuck? How did you get stuck? I cannot fix a potential bug if I have no idea what you are talking about.

Thanks for your feeback, I appreciate it. I believe I gave you feedback on your Apocalypse series and the feedback you gave on this thread is in return for that. That is not to say that I will not check out the latest episode (I do have four of the levels hearted after all) but I may not be able to leave feedback anytime soon.


Thanks again to all who have played/commented/hearted, I really do appreciate it.

Snowspot
02-09-2009, 05:40 PM
Sorry if my comments seemed more negative than helpful. There are many great things about your level but I'd rather focus on the negatives in feedback than the positives.

The elevator problem seemed to be my own, neither me nor the person I was playing with noticed the checkpoint.

As for the destiny ride, randomly it would just stop in places, particularly at the first enemy you fight.

Everything else is pretty good, thats why I don't mention it. I'm not going to take my comments back though. I just really enjoyed the beginning of the level more than the rest, I feel like it's a "flow" problem more than anything. The transition to earth is just strange looking, the last time I played the level the "earth" part was just plain ugly(no offense) not ugly because you can't make something that looks good.. but just unusually ugly for a creator of your calibur.

I'll try to keep my views more positive in the future...

Serpit
02-09-2009, 05:45 PM
I'm starting to get really annyoed now. Replayed your level again, and the same thing happened for the third time. I reach the Garden, ball of light kills me, back to the start of the DESTINY ride.

There has to be some way for me to finish the level xD

CCubbage
02-09-2009, 09:10 PM
I think the checkpoint is the same one that moves to a new location so that when you are killed you end up in a different place. Maybe somehow there is a way to miss the trigger that moves the checkpoint?

I've never been able to make this happen. When it says "218 - don't let go" did you let go?

JackBurton25
02-09-2009, 09:51 PM
Hi Ock,

Thanks again for your feedback on my level.
Now, let's talk about 218 :

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

+ I loved the futuristic look of the first room with the simulated sunlight (nice touch).

+ The two training rooms are very well designed. Especially the second one, with the orb and the switches to trigger at the right moment. As someone said earlier, a complete level featuring challenges like this one would be very cool!

+ I like the way the environment is always changing. From start to finish, everytime there's a twist in the story, you are transported to a completely different place.

+ The sun effect was very cool!

+ Nice use of the "radium blaster". I also renamed it in my level the "eJammer". :)

+ The story is very well written. (-)

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

- One level is not enough for this story. I think there's a bit too much information at once for most of the people playing LBP. Personally, I'd like to discover this story through 2 or 3 levels.

- The part with the vehicle is well made, but a bit long. Also, you should prevent the vehicle from going too far where you have to shoot a switch. I had to kill myself and do all that part again.

- Some fights were a bit easy because it's possible to go back and shoot it from a place where the ennemy can't hit you.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

It's obvious that lots of hours were spent on the making of this level!
Very, very nice job.

5 stars, hearted.

UltraNative
02-09-2009, 09:53 PM
OCK, played your level last night and have to say that I think I liked the Legion more. I think you were trying too hard to come up with an "jaw-dropping" storyline (which really had me lost from hello) and forgot the good old platforming goodies. There isn't much of a challenge in the level and after awhile I was just pushing "circle-circle-circle" to get outta the speech bubbles.

Overall, it's decent. And I really like ALL your work, and community presence. But for some reason i just didn't dig 208 so much dog. Sorry....:(

Morgana25
02-09-2009, 09:57 PM
I'm in awe. It's a great level. I love that the moment you start the level you set an entire backstory with the line about never getting used to artificial sunlight. The robot you speak to is wonderfully designed too. I'm such a sucker for eye candy that you had me sold in the very first scene.

The level play for me was difficult - which isn't a criticism at all. I like levels when they are challenging. It just means that I have to come back a few times to get through.

I know players like to comment on the number of speech bubbles you have but I didn't think it was tedious at all. To fully get the story you need them.

Excellent work!

OCK
02-10-2009, 12:47 PM
JackBurton, thanks for all of your feedback.


One level is not enough for this story.

I agree and that's why there was a big "To Be Continued" sign at the end. If I could I would have crammed even more story into this but I knew I already had a lot. Once again, this has to do with my own design aesthetic and vision for this series.


Also, you should prevent the vehicle from going too far where you have to shoot a switch.

The player is warned to "not get too close to what you see". and at the moon puzzle a speech bubble pops up that starts with "STOP!". Not sure what else I can do.


Some fights were a bit easy because it's possible to go back and shoot it from a place where the ennemy can't hit you.


Yeah this was mentioned by Gilgamesh and I have every intention of working on the problem but have not gotten around to it. Thanks for the reminder.

Thanks for the rating and heart, I appreciate it :)

______________________________________________

Ultranative, thanks for the feedback and I know this story was not for everybody, you can't win 'em all. At least you liked The Legion though. :)

__________________________________________________ ____

Morgana25, thanks for the feedback.



I'm in awe. It's a great level. I love that the moment you start the level you set an entire backstory with the line about never getting used to artificial sunlight. The robot you speak to is wonderfully designed too. I'm such a sucker for eye candy that you had me sold in the very first scene.

This means a lot, thank you.



The level play for me was difficult - which isn't a criticism at all. I like levels when they are challenging. It just means that I have to come back a few times to get through.


lol. One person says easy, anoher says difficult. It is impossible to satisfy everybody where challenge is concerned but I am happy you were not discouraged by the difficulty you encountered.



I know players like to comment on the number of speech bubbles you have but I didn't think it was tedious at all. To fully get the story you need them.

Well I am glad you point this out, there seems to be a 50/50 split between those who enjoy all the story and those who think it's too much. I am happy you fall into the former category :)

Thanks again for all the feedback.

UltraNative
02-10-2009, 03:52 PM
Of course I liked the Legion, it was hot!! After playing this again last night I think I may have been a little too harsh......sorry

Serpit
02-10-2009, 05:56 PM
Finally beat it, it worked this time. I coudl clearly hear the sound of a checkpoint activating when I entered the garden, so I knew that had to be it. Great level, fitting end and it left me wanting more =)
I hope you'll continue the story soon.

On the problem I had: Maybe, for some reaso, the dissolve was triggered and the checkpoint moved down to the Hall of Light before I could pass it? That's the only thing I can think of.

OCK
02-11-2009, 12:27 AM
Finally beat it, it worked this time. I coudl clearly hear the sound of a checkpoint activating when I entered the garden, so I knew that had to be it. Great level, fitting end and it left me wanting more =)
I hope you'll continue the story soon.

On the problem I had: Maybe, for some reaso, the dissolve was triggered and the checkpoint moved down to the Hall of Light before I could pass it? That's the only thing I can think of.

Yay, I am happy now :) As for the dissolve it only triggers when the forground dissolve triggers so it is literally impossible for it to trigger sooner. I am still trying to figure out what gave you trouble lol. Thanks a lot for not giving up on the level, I have paid the same courtesy to your Timeless Village and as soon as I have been able to finish it I will post more thoughts on your thread.

Thanks again to all who have played/commented/hearted, I really do appreciate it.

Takelow
02-11-2009, 11:04 AM
Hey OCK, i just replayed your level and i am very impressed with the great improvement you have done. It was great, it is now AWESOME!!
I loved a lot your new engines and the new materials you added. It is now perfectly polished and you added a lot of small impressive details. The modification in the first orb puzzle is well done (changing the switch position is a good thing here).
Just a suggest: in the orb puzzle part (with the moon and the button you must shot), i first didn't stop (i know that there is a bubble speech saying STOp!!! ...but...) and was blocked in the left part of the screen and been unable to shoot the button. I must have to suicide myself and restart this section. I suggest you add a piece of dissolve matter blocking the way just before the button to avoid player to go furthet. Your button could be connected to this dissolving matters.

Nevertheless, a masterpiece OCK, a true one!

CowTip
02-11-2009, 12:55 PM
I'm back! I decided to give the level another go! I'll throw what feedback and impressions I can while playing through again.

-Training, a nice warm up for the rest of the level. Came really close to dying on that last training boss~ I should be more careful.

-The monster after you blow up the three large walls... I died once while fighting it, but then realized that I could just shoot it from offscreen with no danger at all. Not sure if this is intentional, but I felt like I cheesed through this monster lol.

- I really like how the tears for earth part changes completely from tears to switch to black background.

- Yay! No problems with the moon this time! Crap! While I was typing that while sitting in the vehicle in the garden I got gassed and now I have to drive aaaall the way back. D'oh! Man this'll be a long ride ;)

Oh... oh nuts... I think I just ran into the same bug as Serpit had... after driving back to the garden multiple times and being very confused as to what to do, I checked the rest of the thread and it must have been the same thing. I'm a little sad now XD it's like LBP doesn't want me to finish this level!

Edit: Determined to finish after so many tries, I went through the level again and this time the garden part worked. No idea why it didn't the first time. I wept a little when I realized I was so close to the end all this time! Overall though, great story and I enjoyed some of the crazier effects you put into the level! If you get a chance some time check out my levels! And I look forward to the next episode!

OCK
02-15-2009, 01:12 PM
Thanks for the comments everyone :)

UPDATE

- Added dissolve blockades during the DESTINY sequence to prevent the car from going to far ahead.

There are a couple of more things I will be tweaking but otherwise I think I have done all that I could do with the level and again thank everyone for their invaluable feedback :)

RickTheRipper
02-21-2009, 04:26 AM
I didn't know which level to leave feedback for, so I just decided to do it for your most recent one. But before I do, I'd like to say that The Legion was a really cool level. I enjoyed it alot.


Thoughts as I play:

Nice opening on the bed, and you can see the "sunlight" coming into the room. All the pictures make the place looked lived in, nice touch. Oh, an apple! NOM NOM NOM!

What do we have here? Nice looking robot, very detailed. So some aliens have come back? What?! I need practice before I can kill them? Pssh, I'm a killing machine! :grr:

......Ok, maybe not. I almost lost all my lives in the training simulator. :blush:

Take that you stupid turret! You thought you could mess with 218?! I told you I was a killing machine.

Now I'm moving around an orb. It's a nice little puzzle that doesn't make me feel stupid.

Moving on now, I see the Earth and you're name/level name. Nice use of lighting for the ramp.

I'm fighting a robot now and it looks tough. I like how it has different attacks. Ok, I killed it and now have a key in front of me. Now to drop the gun and touch it.

Going up some platforms now. Once again, nice use of lighting. Oh, that is some pretty looking energy, very nice. Now the robot is talking to me (I think I know why I'm called 218 now). and wants me to look out the window. Now I have to go into a teleporter, but first, I see a missing piece of wall near the observation window. Could this be a secret?....... Nope, I fell down into nothingness. After commiting suicide, I appear in a different area (I'm assuming this is where I'd be teleported).

The Yorva dare mock me?! And then they dare to tell me everything is an illussion?! And then you just disappear instead of fighting?! I'LL FIND YOU!!!

Well, I found them, and how do they greet me? BY SHOOTING AT ME! Well, I'm gonna repay the favor. I died a few times at the missile guy, but the other two were no problem. I've crossed the bridge and now I'm fighting a snake-like thing.

He seems to have dropped an eye, maybe I should take it with me. Hooray, It's emitting points!

Something just told me no cheating, but then it cheated and killed me out of nowhere. CHEATERS!

Now there's this.... thing that's crying. I'll give you something to really cry about you big baby! Ban bang bang! I'm now putting it's eyes into these crescent shapes, but they keep rolling out of range...... Ok, there we go. Now it's time to go up!

I'm going up using an almost invisible platform and some words are being spelled out. Awesome (uploads pic).

What are the Yorva trying to tell me?..... (the plot thickens)

Now I'm being barraged with the word earth. It's kinda creepy. And then I got killed by the gas (no weapons allowed). I'm passing over some light (very cool) and am now being asked about when I first arrived....... I'll just choose 3...... Hooray!

A weird looking face is now talking to me and wants me to get in a vehicle. Sure, why not? I mean, it's not like getting in strange cars is dangerous or anything.

Now a Yorva wants me to shoot him. Seriously, he's just telling me to shoot him. Whatever gets your rocks off buddy.... Bang.

I have to shoot some moving platforms to advance. Done and done.

Woah, these are some great light effects. Especially the sun/star part. Soooo pretty. And now I have to shoot a button to get an orb into the moon. I keep missing...... There we go. I missed, but it was close enough to activate the switch. Hooray!

Somewhere, over the raiiinboo-Oh snap! I'm in a garden and it looks really good. But now I'm being told I have to die. That's not very nice.... but what the hell, it could be fun.

Now I'm in a white room. And there's another weird looking face telling me a story. It would appear that those robots aren't as cool as I thought, and these weird faces are my pals.

OH NO! IT ENDED! WHYYYYY?!!!!



That was a really good level. I liked it alot. It was a great mix of sci-fi and fantasy.


Pros:

- Looked great

- Engaging story and a nice plot twist

- Nice use of lighting/camera angles

- Was never too challenging/frustrating

- The enemies you fought were creative

- Just an all around good experience


Cons:

- The obstacles were pretty basic. Aside from the training simulator, there was nothing too.... complex. The actualy building must've been complex, but the obstacles themselves weren't. There's nothing wrong with it really, but after the simulator, I guess I was expecting more.

- There's that hole in the wall I mentioned.

- The first two tower enemies you fight are really easy. As long as you stay begin the curve on the mountain, they can't get you. Maybe having an emitter higher up to aim at that curve could fix that.



If you couldn't tell from my "Thoughts as I play", I really liked this level. Overall, I gave it 5 stars and a heart. I eagerly anticipate the sequel.

OCK
02-21-2009, 04:45 AM
Wow, thanks for all that feedback lol.



- There's that hole in the wall I mentioned.

Very strange and you are the first person to mention it. I will fix this the next time I am on. Thanks a lot for this.



- The first two tower enemies you fight are really easy. As long as you stay begin the curve on the mountain, they can't get you. Maybe having an emitter higher up to aim at that curve could fix that.


This has been mentioned before but I have not had the chance to tweak things yet. Thanks for the reminder :)





If you couldn't tell from my "Thoughts as I play", I really liked this level. Overall, I gave it 5 stars and a heart. I eagerly anticipate the sequel.

Thanks a lot for this, I appreciate it. I am currently working on a couple of projects and will probably start work on the sequel after those are published.

Btw, I have all 3 of your levels hearted so I am glad you enjoyed both this and The Legion.

Thanks again to all who have played/commented/hearted, I appreciate it.

uzman
02-21-2009, 09:30 AM
This level is not easy. Just wanted to point that out.:p

Whalio Cappuccino
02-21-2009, 08:34 PM
Alright OCK buddy, here's my feedback. Sorry it took so long.

Things going through my head

- The first scene, inside your room, is a great start, and I love all the pictures in the back, those were added I assume since I didn't see them during playtesting.

-Perfect music, for the start of the level. Well done, you've always had a good ear for your level's playlist.

- That robot/alien/waffle thing or whatever, right at the start, is really amazing. The changing colors, you also have a keen eye for lighting just like Takelow. Good stuff.

- Lol... Random picture of chess in the backround? Wtf...

The Positive

- Like I said above, your gameplay is always new and fun, I've already played this section before, but I must say I have never seen anything like Training #2, I give you a thumbs up for that one!

- Wow, definately added some new stuff to the first section, I love the little sheild, everything in your level looks so futuristic!

- Ahh, feels so relaxing, after the training section, how you kept the same song but took out that upbeat, crazy melody. I'm truly amazed at how good your levels keep progressing.

- I love that power source section, I've stated it before, just wanted to re-state it. :p

- Man your story here is amazing, I actually CAN'T WAIT to get to the ending.

- Oh my god... That section with the "You Do Not See?" Dude, that was AMAZING. Holy crap.

- Wtf! Every step I take I seem to be more amazed, the DESTINY vehicle, is amazing. I am practically writing this while Sackboy is upside down... Nice work, and to still be able to function it? My God...

- .....I'm speechless, this sun looking thing, with the stars around it... Dude wtf how are you even fitting all of this inside your thermometer?

Suggestions/Feedback

- The section were you attack the snake looking Yorva, it seems to take way to long to defeat it, and the constant weaving in and out of that middle layer makes it seem even longer, I don't know if you want to change it, but maybe taking down the amount of paint bubbles a bit would help. Again, just personal opinion.

- I had no idea I had to kill those two "eyes" that were crying, and what was that random speech bubble talking about? "No cheating 218." I did no such thing! Oh, disregard this, I just found out your killing me so I can lose the paintinator. I see I see... It's all making sense now!

- Umm, the Garden section. I had to think for a good 30 seconds as to what I was suppose to do. Was that giant shiny orb suppose to kill me? Because it didn't, I killed my self, so if that's not suppose to happen, look up on it.

Overall

Well what can I say? Nothing, yes nothing. I am truly amazed, this journey you took me on OCK was amazing, I somehow knew the ending, but never the less, it was a great ride. Beautiful lighting, a wonderful story like always, and amazing new gameplay/mechanics I had never seen before. I don't really think I need to say this but... 5 Stars and a HUGE Heart.

OCK
02-26-2009, 12:22 PM
Wow Whaaaale, thanks for all that feedback!



- Lol... Random picture of chess in the backround? Wtf...

lol, nothing in my levels are random. As stated in the first post there is a lot of symbolism in the lvl which I leave open to the player to discover and interpret. Funny you should mention the chess picture of all things because the symbolism of that picture is probably the most important in the entire level...


Ahh, feels so relaxing, after the training section, how you kept the same song but took out that upbeat, crazy melody. I'm truly amazed at how good your levels keep progressing.

I am glad you poin this out. Music selection has always been as important as every other element I think the way I mixed the two tracks I used in both parts of the lvl really reflect what is happening on screen.



- Wtf! Every step I take I seem to be more amazed, the DESTINY vehicle, is amazing. I am practically writing this while Sackboy is upside down...

lol, thanks man. I have played a couple of lvls that use "anti-grav" vehicles but never any lvl that had one that could be stopped at any point and be fully controllable. So yeah, you can sit there upside down forever and the cart won't move an inch.



- .....I'm speechless, this sun looking thing, with the stars around it... Dude wtf how are you even fitting all of this inside your thermometer?

I am surprised myself and actually still have room on my thermo :)



- The section were you attack the snake looking Yorva, it seems to take way to long to defeat it, and the constant weaving in and out of that middle layer makes it seem even longer, I don't know if you want to change it, but maybe taking down the amount of paint bubbles a bit would help. Again, just personal opinion.

Since there are no "real" bosses I wanted to have this battle last a bit longer then usual but thanks for your thoughts, I may consider lowring the HP.


Umm, the Garden section. I had to think for a good 30 seconds as to what I was suppose to do. Was that giant shiny orb suppose to kill me? Because it didn't, I killed my self, so if that's not suppose to happen, look up on it.


Hmmm, that's strange. Were you moving the cart towards the right? It may have taken the mag switch out of range although it is not likely. Thanks for this, I will look into it.


Well what can I say? Nothing, yes nothing. I am truly amazed, this journey you took me on OCK was amazing, I somehow knew the ending, but never the less, it was a great ride. Beautiful lighting, a wonderful story like always, and amazing new gameplay/mechanics I had never seen before. I don't really think I need to say this but... 5 Stars and a HUGE Heart.

Thanks a lot for this and thanks again for being an early supporter of this project, I really appreciate it :)

Hexagohn
02-26-2009, 11:26 PM
Hey man, sounds like you made a lot of changes. I think I will check it out again tonight or tomorrow.

Thegide
03-03-2009, 01:28 AM
Woohoo, I finally get to play this one! Let me jump straight to the chase...

First impressions:
Right away this level stands out as something different, and it's not because the art is amazing, its because of the little things. The joke about simulated daylight, the custom eyetoy stickers, and the use of symbols in place of letters in the dialogue. Right away the story struck me as being really cool...

The rooms:
Very interesting mixup of playstyle. Room 1 has a turret puzzle that requires you to move quickly. If you move quickly, however, you can make your first pass at the turret before the plasma balls ever reach you. Of course, its more fun to try to weave through them. I liked the physics puzzle of room 2 a lot. The mech in room 3 I expected to tear me a new ***, but I was able to take it out its first from a distance, despite not seeing it on screen.

The Yorva planet:
The plain black background is not something I normally like to see anywhere, but here, it makes perfect sense. The first paintinator challenge has a great rube goldberg-like mechanism, although the difficulty seemed backwards (the first pillar was the hardest to fell, the last was the easiest). The eyeball puzzle was pretty neat; nice touch requiring the paintgun to move the eyes, but why did you make me run to the far side to get the gun in the first place? (Minor point, but I like to be thorough in my reviews) The next section with the zero grav tank was totally innovative! Great use of spotlights here and your shining sun was "WOW!"

In the section where the orb must kiss the moon, I wasn't sure if I could accidentally drive too far and screw up my chances for hitting the switch. Presumably, you've already thought of this and made this impossible. Lots of fun, star-basketball is.

Story: This is where this level shines (well, there and with all the great spotlights). A great story developed along the way, and in the end, it all made perfect sense. Really liked the gene splicing part... after all I do have a PhD in genetics...truth!

I did find one spelling mistake near the end with the face-wall. 3rd group of text bubbles, first or second one in... spelled "theother".

Other cool effects:
Teleporter. Not only a really cool device, but great presentation also. Adds to the "immersion factor" of the level. This HAS to be pointed out.

Overall:
Great job man! Fantastic story and innovative gameplay. Great use of visual effects, even though the aesthetics have some room for improvement in general (and I truly think this is why it's only rated 3 stars, not 4). Regarding the vehicle section.... I generally try to keep vehicle parts near the beginning of the level, or keep them short. Vehicles tend to disrupt the pace of the level (because they are usually slow and leave you with little to do other than hold R1). In this case, you introduce the level with an action-packed start, but then the level slows down during the vehicle section at the end. It's fun nonetheless, but something to consider for future level-building :)

5 stars and hearted!