The Vending Machine Game

I dodge flawlessly the cooker like a boss.

I throw in a license to unban

I don't take it, unbanning is too mainstream /NysHipster
I throw et back in.

I pick it up again.

I throw in a ninja!

I get ninja'd (a.k.a. sniped)

I throw in Dormin.

I fall asleep.

I throw in my sig.

I get a mess of words.

I fire some rounds into the vending machine.

Thay retain their momentum (which is impossible, according to the Mythbusters) and kill me.

I put my PS3 into the vending machine.

I get a PS Vita (same thing practically).

Unamused, I throw it back into the machine.

I get a PS Vita 3D.

I throw in myself.

You are now an extra-human.

I throw my laptop into the vending machine.

I get HTML

I throw an ironic soda can in the machine.

I get an un-ironic soda can.

I throw in my new thread! :D

You get SPAM.

I throw in an anti-virus software

You get an anti-virus soda.

I throw in a time paradox.

I get out some Wibbly Wobbly timey-wimey stuff.

I throw in a deed to a house

I get the house's mortgage back.

I throw in Sackboy.

I get a very expensive sackboy doll.
I throw liquid text in the machine.

I get a liquid paragraph.

I throw in the Harry Potter Puppet Pals. (Don't ask me why, 'cause I don't know.)

You get the Justice Friends back.

I throw in a bikini.

... And I get a bikini. Woo! Bikini's FTW.
I throw a Sillinator in the machine.