Corrupt Wishes

Granted, but then he wished for a wish which made everyone turn into lollipops, including himself.

I wish for lots of Domino cookies.

Granted, but they're filled with poison.

I wish I had time to post on all of these instead of just my favorites.

Granted, but you can not type anymore.

I wish I had motivation, energy and a laptop which actually works.

Granted, but it still fails to make a decent essay,

I wish I could choose which retro tracks made it into the next Mario Kart.

Granted, but other people think they're crappy and hunt you down.

I wish for 1 000 000 €

Granted, but you have to use it to pay for Donald Trump's tax debt.

I wish I could play games with ChilledChaos.

Granted, but you can only play Big Rigs together.

I wish for a laptop that actually works.

Granted, but Donald Trump buys it from you.

I wish my activity were higher.

Granted, but then admins ban you for having more than 101% activity.

I wish my little brother isn't such a pain in my head.

Granted, but he punches you in the gut instead.

I wish Nemo knew that I wrote that previous post when I was only at 85% activity and not 99.9%.

Granted, but the admins still ban you for having more than 101% activity.

I wish L1N3R1D3R knew how corrupt wishes work.

Granted, but now I know more than you do, even about yourself.

I wish I didn't have major homework over his long weekend.

Granted, but then you have a major disaster which causes America to explode.

I wish L1N3R1D3R's grammar was as perfect as he wishes it to be.

Granted, but now I can't learn to laugh at my mistakes, and I become a jerk to you.

I wish I had all the ice cream.

Granted, but then you get into jail for stealing all the world's ice creams for 99 years.

I wish my body would stay healthy as long as I am alive.

Granted, but you steal the healthiness from starving children.

I wish I could have inspiration to write my stupid essay.

Granted, but you get F anyway.

I wish I have lots of money to live the rest of my life without work.

Granted, but you become Donald Trump.

I wish I could have a gaming chair.

Granted, but you are invalid and can't do anything.

I wish I could control lighting.

Granted, but every tiny change you make kills a loved one.

I wish there weren't so many political ads attacking other candidates.

Granted, but now the ads are killing civilians.

I wish I could heal any injury.

Granted, but the wounds transfer to your own body.

I wish this thread were called "Rain on your parade".

Granted, but then you get mugged every night after that.

I wish I'm L1N3R1D3R.

Granted, but you procrastinate every day.

I wish my teacher would understand that I don't think like he does.

Granted, but now you think like a zombie.

I wish I could visit the capital on Wednesday.

Granted, but you visit the capital of some poor African country.

I wish I had enough time to make a 1000 subscriber special.

Granted, but then you lose those subscribers instantly.

I wish for plums.

Granted, but Michael Rosen steals them immediately.

I wish I could maintain normal energy levels without having to sleep.

Granted, but you have to spent your lifetime on a wheelchair.

i WISH IT'S CONSIDERED NORMAL TO HAVE SMALL LETTERS AS BIG AND BIG LETTERS AS SMALL.

Granted, but no one else uses it, so you still look weird.

I wish I could play Mega Man X.

Granted, but you must give up your organic body and live as a cyborg.

I wish I got the power!

Granted, but you got the power to kill an ant.

I wish my ukulele didn't sound like crap.

Granted, its silent now.

I wish to visit that island where people plays ukelele and party.

Granted, but it's my house. 8D

I wish you knew which island you were talking about so I could help you.

Granted, but you have to visit my house 1st. 8)

I wish for a corruption which also happened to everyone on LBPC.

Granted, but that includes you.

I wish there were some alternative to homework.

Granted, the alternative is working 16-hour shifts at an under-staffed Starbucks during the Christmas season.

I wish I didn't have to wait a week for the next episode of Dragon Ball Super.

Granted, but you don't have enough time to watch the constant stream of episodes.

I wish I knew how to rhetoric.

Granted, but you don't know how to do anything else.

I wish I didn't have to wait until February for Power Of The Daleks.

Granted, but you lose your obsession with Doctor Who.

I wish I knew the source of Robo4900's signature.