Corrupt Wishes

[Outlaw-Jack•]

Granted. But since it doesn't have the word "survival" in it, it's completely ignored.

I wish LBP2 came out next week.

[TheZimInvader]

Granted, but it's buggier than the beta and freezes as soon as you get to your pod.

I wish I could pause and unpause time as I wish, and there is no chance it will get stuck.

[Ragnarok]

granted but all the pausing and un-pausing drives you mad

I wish for a nuclear microwave!

[gdn001]

Granted, but you decide to put eggs with sausages in it and it explodes.

I wish to be invisible!

[TheZimInvader]

Granted, but now everybody ignores you and you practically don't exist.

I wish all of my problems would go away.

[gdn001]

Granted, but your life gets really boring.

I wish to be able to understand the implicit meaning of every text in the world instantly.

[TheZimInvader]

Granted, but attempting to understand so much context drives you insane in an instant.

I wish I could do whatever I wanted.

[gdn001]

Granted, but your friends must face the consequences of your acts.

I wish I was able to defend my friends, no matter what happens.

[Merc]

granted but they don't pay you, and make you sing a lulabye at night.

I wish I didn't have any homework right now so I could go play black ops LBP

[EmilyCat]

Granted, but then you can never play a game again!
I wish that I didn't have a cough

[Ragnarok]

Granted, but now you have an intense headache.

I wish for a perfect burrito!

[gdn001]

Granted, but it explodes from extreme awesomeness (not to mention the chilli peppers) upon eating it.

I wish for infinite pizza spawn!

[Ragnarok]

Granted, but its a lame pizza (makes me sad cuz i love pizza)

I wish for real working Laser Rifle!!

[gdn001]

Granted, but you forgot to ask for ammo!

I wish for an upgraded M16 rifle!

[Ragnarok]

Granted, but its broken

I wish for some microfusion cells for my Laser rifle!

[gdn001]

Granted, but you expose it to fire and it explodes on your face like the burrito!

I wish for a Particle Accelerator!

[Ragnarok]

Granted but its too big to put it in your house!

I wish for a giant (around 1 cubic meter) living animal cell!

[gdn001]

Granted, but it doesn't survive because it is separated from the tissue.

I wish for a controllabe blackhole!

[Ragnarok]

granted, but the thing that controls the black hole gets sucked in and then the black hole takes you in too.

I wish for a new planet on the solar system!

[gdn001]

Granted, but it collides with Mars, messes up with Venus's orbit and sends Earth spinning uncontrolably, making our days last 5 hours from now on!

I wish for peppermint leaves!