Corrupt Wishes

[xero]

Granted, but they all give you the same paper mask.

I wish I was a world-famous 3D artist.

[ChrisF2112]

You have your fame, but only long after you are dead. You instead live as a penniless beggar.

I wish more people buy LBPV.

[xero]

Granted, but they're all kids who make nothing but bomb and zombie survival levels and post negative reviews/comments on your levels.

I wish the LBP community as a whole was more mature.

[ChrisF2112]

It is, but the series stops making money, so they discontinue server support and drop the series altogether.

I wish that there was another category akin to cool levels where moderators and trusted players could put high quality levels from sites such as this on a temporary basis so they would receive more recognition and plays.

[yugnar]

It does exist, but only when the game is already dead, so people rarely check out this levels, and good levels are extremely rare.

I wish I could get videogames for free.

[ChrisF2112]

You get every game for free, but every game has 5 minutes of unskippable commercials every 10 minutes.

I wish that my calculator could read numbers off the page and instantly do the operation.

[yugnar]

Done, but it is only a elemental calculator (not a scientific one), so all your operations will be only from elementary school. Oh, and it somehow crashes and gives you wrong answers.

I wish I could rewrite Resident's Evil past titles' story, so that they aren't so bad.

[Patofan]

Granted, but they release them as DLCs.

I wish my internet didn't lag so much

[xero]

Granted--your internet breaks, preventing it from being able to lag.

I wish my coffee would wake me up more quickly.

[Patofan]

Granted, it wakes you so fast it wastes your energy, tiring you again and making you sleep.

[ChrisF2112]

Granted. Nothing happens, but since nothing is nothing, you notice no difference between nothing happening and nothing not happening.

I wish that I was home.

[yugnar]

Granted, but your home burned down, so you have nowhere to go, which takes you to a limbo were you'll never be able to escape.

I wish I could speak many languages fluently.

[xero]

Granted, but then you begin to overhear people speaking in different languages, and they usually don't have anything nice to say, since they think no one around can understand them.

I wish to meet Deadmau5 in person.

[Patofan]

Granted, you get a dead mouse in your mail.

I wish I didn't forget to wish.

[xero]

Granted, but the sheer irony of the situation you've just created implodes the universe.

I wish the universe wasn't imploded.

[ChrisF2112]

Rather than imploding, it simply explodes.

I wish that candy was not bad for you.

[Patofan]

Granted, now it's awful. Just seeing it makes you implode.

I wish I didn't implode when I saw candy.

[ChrisF2112]

To be certain you never mistake anything for candy, the only food you are allowed to see (let alone eat) is that pea soup baby mush. Gross.

I wish I could fall asleep.

[xero]

Granted, but then you never wake up.

I wish for fish.

[NL2112]

granted,but all your fish will die

I wish i dont have to go to school