Corrupt Wishes

[L1N3R1D3R•]

Granted, but now he's rolling. You see him rollin'. You hatin'.

I wish I knew which cards would be the funniest to make.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but then the Russian government forces you to make them in their name.

I wish U.S.A. wouldn't eat my hamburgers.

[Sir monacle]

Granted, but now the communists eat them.



I wish I was asleep right now.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but you will never wake up because you forgot to eat and you starved to death.

I wish I had the deathnote.

[L1N3R1D3R•]

Granted, but you die.

I wish I could live with full energy without needing to sleep.

[Sir monacle]

Granted, but if you stop using your energy, your lungs fill up with blood and you choke from the result. So, uhh. Don't stop moving, mmm'kay?




I wish I had a medical licence.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but you're also a drug addict.

I wish I got 999 rupees.

[Sir monacle]

Granted, but they're completely worthless.




I wish I could post twice.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but you can only type 2 letters in each post.

I wish I can play all week without consequences.

[L1N3R1D3R•]

Granted, but you broke this forum game.

I wish we could just get along and not hate anyone else.

[Sir monacle]

Granted, but we all band together to hate jobs.




I wish I had a bag o' fluff.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but the bag is full of fluffy, hungry wolves and you are their 1st meal.

I wish it's already weekend.

[Sir monacle]

Granted, but you're trapped as those two days loop over and over again.




I wish I knew what to wish for.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but you already wasted your wish.

I wish Sir monacle is in my pokeball.

[Sir monacle]

Granted, but it'd rather be outside.




I wish there was flat-screen Television set in this Pokeball. That'll do.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but you can only watch The Kardashians from it.

I wish chairs can talk.

[Sir monacle]

Granted, but only you can hear them, and they never shut up.




I wish I had a computer inside this Pokeball so I can play forum games while TenebrisNemo abuses other Pokémon in battle.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but the computer is from the 90s.

I wish I can slap people over the internet.

[L1N3R1D3R•]

Granted, but you must be punched in return.

I wish I could express just how much I loathe the current presidency.

[TenebrisNemo]

Granted, but you're just one drop of that mass and I would happily silence you all with a flamethrower.

I wish I could burn you AND the presidency.