SNOW WHITE-Noire

[EnochRoot]

A tale from the Dark side of LBP...
A gritty film noire re-interpretation of the folk tale classic. A cinematic / interactive drama in which you re-trace the footsteps of the central characters, discovering how the tragic story unfolds. Set amid the dark streets of Sacktropolis, filled with sinister characters and dangers. NOTE- MAY BE A LITTLE SCARY FOR YOUNGER SACKS!





Technical note: For best playing experience adjust your LBP profile settings to display sub-titles.

All feedback appreciated and reciprocated.
reviews: http://lbp.me/v/0t8w69/reviews

http://lbp.me/v/0t8w69

[pickled-punk]

Sounds great, added to playlist!

[EnochRoot]

Sounds great, added to playlist!

Thanks PP, look forward to your feedback. It's an interactive drama with a little gameplay relief half way through to break up the heavy going of the narrative.
based on the Snow White tale but in a modern contemporary setting.

[Mr_Fusion•]

Hmmm... I'm not sure what to do with this

All the other feedback I have given is for levels that have their main focus on gameplay, not story telling. The use of lighting/effects at the start are pretty impressive, the fact that you have black and white, but still with some strong colours from signage. It's used very well to make the opening Act have an uneasy feeling.

You use some very clever and restrained extra layers to help wit your layout. The hands were very original and looked amazing.

The voice acting is good and is usually easy to understand, especially because you've gone to the extra efforts to have subtitles also. I liked the bubble offer bit, and thought that it'd be interesting to have one always spawn as you walk away. So you go back, wait for some more, but none come... so you walk off and another pops up.

The second act transition was a little confusing at first, but now that I think back about it makes sense. Although the pan across the Mm sign could do with a bit better lighting.

I didn't like the kill teleport, but as I said I'm used to playing platformers and such. I don't know if you considered using the controlinator teleport method?

The Apple kicking destroying the kitchen was again a nice touch, but I was a little miffed that it killed me, but only for a few seconds as it was used as a story element and worked pretty well. The dark screen with flashes of light was a really powerful touch.

Overall, I liked it, but wasn't expecting that much of a story when I loaded it up and the gameplay in the second act was a little light. This isn't a negative really, but I had just finished a level of left for dead and may not have been in the right headspace for a story level.

[xkjz3l]

I remember this from LBP1,but this update with the new tools make it better.
I really liked the history,a good drama enoch good job

[mercury7891]

I definitely recommend this level. Great atmosphere and an interesting take on fairy tales. If you want a unique level, then this is for you.

[Flatbadger]

Hi Enoch,

This looks cool, I have it queued for later.. very L.A Noire esq..

[Flatbadger]

Hi Enoch,

Great level!
Really good intro to the level, which captured the sinister atmosphere right away.
I can see a lot of thought and time has gone into this and it's paid off..
the contrast between the dirty evil street section and the happy safe MM room's was unreal! really took me by surprise...

Superb use of the layer glitch (which I must perfect in later levels)

All in all loved it.

cheers.

[Stampy]

This level has an interesting take on the story levels, and I like the writing very much, although I have to admit that I somehow craved for an even more beefy story… Which brings me to another point, maybe you should start considering doing movies instead of levels. I really don’t see the benefit of gameplay in this story. I had a feeling that sackboy was there just to be used as a camera rather than a direct participant in the story. Which is probably also due to the fact that we are controlling a sackboy and not sackbot with predefined costume (a story about a girl, yet I control a sackboy, or some people will control some comical creations, etc…)

There was one point in the story that I don't know if I connected it well… But due to the fact that early on in the level you have introduced score bubbles as an equivalent to dope, then later in the happy parts, where there is an abundance of score bubbles and colors are all hippy and everything is so puketastic happy, the logical conclusion was that the character is high and totally immersed in this world of drugs… O_o I don’t know if that was your intention or not, but I just could not avoid coming to such a conclusion. :/

Anyway, although your levels are a bit rough, they have something unique to them and I am always glad to play them, because afterwards I am feeling like the time was well spent. You have an interesting and creative drive, and I only wish you would create more extensive stories. But then again, if you have a preference for shorter stories, I totally understand you not agreeing with me, but still, I can always hope that one day you surprise us with something spectacularly unique.

[The Gentleman]

I'll be able to feeback on this in a couple of days.

[onaga666]

Hey dude , I'll que this up now . I'll leave a review on your level, could you leave a review on my level "Fornight of Fright"?

Here is the review I left on LBP

"Beautiful Story, but i think you could work on design a bit more. But overall it looked like you put a lot of work into it Bravo."

Personally I think you had a GREAT idea, but you didn't put enough effort into the design and level layout. Sometimes it felt like I was playing one of those really old levels when LBP1 first came out.
But I respect you man, and your level idea and story were FANTASTIC, I loved the MM place and all the random jobs. It actually got better at the very end, especially how you used lighting to create the effect of your character being blacked out.

So overall:
Brillant Story
Mediocre Design
Amazing use of lighting
Fantasy layout and original

Anyway I had fun playing it, and it really brought me back. And thats what levels are really about aren't they? Fun?

[EnochRoot]

Hmmm... I'm not sure what to do with this

All the other feedback I have given is for levels that have their main focus on gameplay, not story telling. The use of lighting/effects at the start are pretty impressive, the fact that you have black and white, but still with some strong colours from signage. It's used very well to make the opening Act have an uneasy feeling.

You use some very clever and restrained extra layers to help wit your layout. The hands were very original and looked amazing.

The voice acting is good and is usually easy to understand, especially because you've gone to the extra efforts to have subtitles also. I liked the bubble offer bit, and thought that it'd be interesting to have one always spawn as you walk away. So you go back, wait for some more, but none come... so you walk off and another pops up.

The second act transition was a little confusing at first, but now that I think back about it makes sense. Although the pan across the Mm sign could do with a bit better lighting.

I didn't like the kill teleport, but as I said I'm used to playing platformers and such. I don't know if you considered using the controlinator teleport method?

The Apple kicking destroying the kitchen was again a nice touch, but I was a little miffed that it killed me, but only for a few seconds as it was used as a story element and worked pretty well. The dark screen with flashes of light was a really powerful touch. Happy you understood the speech and really recommend using sub titles when ever implementing voice acting as an aid to clarity. Will definitely look into the bubbles, nice idea.

Overall, I liked it, but wasn't expecting that much of a story when I loaded it up and the gameplay in the second act was a little light. This isn't a negative really, but I had just finished a level of left for dead and may not have been in the right headspace for a story level.

Thanks for taking the time to play and feedback MrFusion, I guess I should warn people of the strong story element rather than bbble popping bounce pad fun.
Great idea about the bubble spawn inferring the addictive draw of the bubbles, I'll try and implement that. I used the new LBP2 teleport on recent levels but the skeleton of this one is a LBP1 level hence the gas death transport, I kinda like the way it adds a fatality element to darken the mood further.
The lighting and extra layer was restrained and dictated by the subject matter to a degree.
Let me know when the next part of your series is out and I'll take the DeLorean for a spin again.

I remember this from LBP1,but this update with the new tools make it better.
I really liked the history,a good drama enoch good job

Thanks buddy, I thought the new tools would improve the drmatic content enough to make it worth doing.

I definitely recommend this level. Great atmosphere and an interesting take on fairy tales. If you want a unique level, then this is for you.

Thanks dude, always strive to bring something different or unique, may not be popular but helps push perception of what a LBP2 level can be.

Hi Enoch,

Great level!
Really good intro to the level, which captured the sinister atmosphere right away.
I can see a lot of thought and time has gone into this and it's paid off..
the contrast between the dirty evil street section and the happy safe MM room's was unreal! really took me by surprise...

Superb use of the layer glitch (which I must perfect in later levels)

All in all loved it.

cheers.

Thanks FB, happy you noted the marked juxta position of the streets and the videogame escapism of the MM section. Playing on the concepts of videogames being an addiction and an escape from reality. If you ever want a hand with the extra work let me know and I'll be happy to assist.

This level has an interesting take on the story levels, and I like the writing very much, although I have to admit that I somehow craved for an even more beefy story… Which brings me to another point, maybe you should start considering doing movies instead of levels. I really don’t see the benefit of gameplay in this story. I had a feeling that sackboy was there just to be used as a camera rather than a direct participant in the story. Which is probably also due to the fact that we are controlling a sackboy and not sackbot with predefined costume (a story about a girl, yet I control a sackboy, or some people will control some comical creations, etc…)

There was one point in the story that I don't know if I connected it well… But due to the fact that early on in the level you have introduced score bubbles as an equivalent to dope, then later in the happy parts, where there is an abundance of score bubbles and colors are all hippy and everything is so puketastic happy, the logical conclusion was that the character is high and totally immersed in this world of drugs… O_o I don’t know if that was your intention or not, but I just could not avoid coming to such a conclusion. :/

Anyway, although your levels are a bit rough, they have something unique to them and I am always glad to play them, because afterwards I am feeling like the time was well spent. You have an interesting and creative drive, and I only wish you would create more extensive stories. But then again, if you have a preference for shorter stories, I totally understand you not agreeing with me, but still, I can always hope that one day you surprise us with something spectacularly unique.

Thanks Stampy,
The roughness may be due to the fact that this has a LBP1 level skeleton upon which newer tools (sackbots, recorded speech, holograms etc) have been added.
A lot of my output on LBP1 had a cinematic feel to it, but when LBP2 came out I was disappointed at was is the general standard of the movie levels. Even with the better ones people often pop off without finishing as engagement and attention wane. How often have you played one and wished it would end? So by way of a compromise why not engage the player, make them central to the drama that unfolds rather than an unwilling participant. Let's face it there are plenty of great movies on tv or blue ray but at the heart of LBP is player and community interactivity. At a rough estimate i would say less than 5% of LBP movie levels have any real creative substance.
I think your right the addition of a controllinator driven Snow white sackbot heroine would really amplify empathy with the storyline but thermo is bursting, I wish I had implemented that first.
In terms of really overly detailing or fleshing out the story, I like to leave people draw upon their own imagination to a degree, as in the perception of the bubbles as drugs etc. Some people see the level as darker in tone than others but like a poem it enables people to have their own personal perception. I think LBp needs more levels like this and your Shattered embrace http://lbp.me/v/0ms5qd to balance out the bright cheerfulness of the majority of levels. levels like this lurking in the shadows help them shine more bright by way of contrast.

I'll be able to feeback on this in a couple of days.

thankyou, you sir are a gentleman!

Hey dude , I'll que this up now . I'll leave a review on your level, could you leave a review on my level "Fornight of Fright"?

Here is the review I left on LBP

"Beautiful Story, but i think you could work on design a bit more. But overall it looked like you put a lot of work into it Bravo."

Personally I think you had a GREAT idea, but you didn't put enough effort into the design and level layout. Sometimes it felt like I was playing one of those really old levels when LBP1 first came out.
But I respect you man, and your level idea and story were FANTASTIC, I loved the MM place and all the random jobs. It actually got better at the very end, especially how you used lighting to create the effect of your character being blacked out.

So overall:
Brillant Story
Mediocre Design
Amazing use of lighting
Fantasy layout and original

Anyway I had fun playing it, and it really brought me back. And thats what levels are really about aren't they? Fun?

Thanks for the play and feedback.
the level design was handicapped by being based on the structure of a LBP1 level,
it did pretty well on LBP1 almost 900 hearts in 7000 plays, and favourable comments http://lbp.me/v/q0m6rd/comments
But as the central emphasis is the narrative and story I thought a bit of re-editing would help convey it more effectively.
One day I might rip the whole thing and start it all from scratch so gameplay etc come up to the story standard.

Will be checking your level and feeding back soon, thanks for taking the time once again.

[Nick930930]

The Good:
-Good story
-A voice over that actually sounds like somebody else. Idk about you, but everytime I play a level with a voice over, it always sounds like the same 15 year old kid XD

The Bad:
-3D glitch just looks ugly
-too many different materials and lacks polish
-Feels like it was made in LBP1
-Some random bugs. The car that drives by, if you jump ,you get knocked FAR AWAY lol. Had to restart level
-The Media Molecule place looked just..ugly
-The floor is visible. This usually takes away from the overall look and feel of your level
-WAY TOO GRAPHIC. My little nephew plays this game and I don't want him seeing this stuff. You need to tone it WAY DOWN. This is LittleBigPlanet... I'm old enough to understand the message your conveying, but the vast majority of the players in the game are definetly not. Parents buy LBP for their kids because there's a cute little sackboy on the cover and they expect nothing bad to be in the game.

[Mr_Fusion•]

Thanks for addressing my feedback, I really like to see the reasons behind another creators choices. You may not agree with their choices all the time, but there is always a logic to the madness

And also thank you for taking time and leaving feedback on my level, it's great to know that I seem to be on the right track with what I'm doing.

I didn't realise that this was a LBP1 redux, so that explains some of the 'older' design choices, and there is nothing wrong with the teleport you use as it is a story element. I guess I just wasn't ready for the first time I got killed.

[EnochRoot]

Thanks for the feedback guys.
@nick93
Glad you liked the story and totally agree about the voice thing.

As for the negatives yep it was originally a LBP1 level as I stated in the post before yours. Aesthetic taste varies some like the gritty look and extra layer work some prefer the 3 layer look, in my latest ICO level which you were good enough to play I think I did it more justice.
I'll pull out the jet engine which produces the cars smoke trail, that'll stop the knocking effect.
This level has been around on LBP1 for a year and a half, rated with almost 900 hearts and 8000 plays, the response has been very positive as you'll be able to see in the comments: http://lbp.me/v/q0m6rd/comments I used testers of all ages and backgrounds to ensure it wasn't too much, most of the heartfelt responses actually come from younger folk and some teachers who enjoyed the level.
there are a lot of levels out there with gratuitous gore and horror far beyond anything contained here. A lot of folk enjoy something unique and original and lets hope others don't go overboard in dictating what should constitute a LBP level or all we'll have left are free costume,bubble bounce pad generic mm story themed levels and zombie survivals. LBP2 will then head the way of its predecessor.

@ Mr Fusion, thanks dude.
Glad you can see how the gas ads to the feel of mortality, one of the main themes played upon within the level. As far as logic in my madness? You should see my logic work! It's a complete disgrace, I'm the biggest techtard on LBP!